In All Things...

A Waxing Moon in Rabbit Season

2009-02-23T14:27:00.007-06:00

In case you didn't know, I made it to Maine. I'm all settled in at the Godins' and working on figuring out job and other stuff. Things are going very well. I'm quickly making friends and gaining clear vision on my purpose for this season of life. I don't think I ever mentioned that I sprained (or something similar... I didn't go to the doctor) my knee about 6 weeks ago. Before you get too concerned, it's doing much better now. See, I just saved you weeks of worrying. I'm rehabbing it right now by riding my bicycle on my trainer down in the basement. I've been doing this and that around town and running into all kinds of people, including some pretty interesting neighbors, which brings me to a couple amusing anecdotes from this morning...

It snowed a good 6 or 7 inches last night, and it wasn't your run of the mill powder. No, it was the thick and nasty kind; the kind of snow you don't want to leave lying around for fear it will turn into cold, heavy concrete. I woke at 7:15 this morning to my alarm, the snow blower cranking up right outside my bedroom window, and suited up for shoveling. After clearing the driveway enough for Debbie to get out to go to work, we headed down the street to make our daily rounds. Second on the list was one of the aforementioned neighbors, Dennis (Not to be confused with the guy I live with, Dennis, or his youngest son, Dennis, Jr., who is off in NY in college). I don't know much of this guy's story, but I do know that he broke his arm last week and came over to ask us to clear his driveway for him. I think it's also relevant to what I'm about to tell you to mention he has a large round nose, a thick New England accent (they don't really say r's unless it's to add an extra 'r' after an 'a'. "Park the car, Brenda" becomes "Pahk the cah, Brender") and speaks slowly. Back to the story. Dennis got going with the snow blower while Joey and I started shoveling out around the deck. Everything was going according to plan until I heard a crunch-crunch-crunch behind me and saw brown chunks of something shooting out of the snow blower. We all stopped to see what we just destroyed. What we found was the remains of a decorative porcelain porch bunny. Neighbor Dennis let out a bellowing, rapid fire "huh-huh-huh-huh" laugh and blurted out, "Dennis is a wabbit killa!" I busted out laughing, and so he just repeated it again and again. "He's a wabbit killa! A wabbit killa!" (Go ahead and say it out loud.) I don't think he could have done a better Elmer Fudd impression if he was actually trying.

We did a couple more driveways before we made it to our last one where Bob and his wife live. Now Bob is quite an interesting guy. He's a Vietnam vet in his seventies and spent time in France as a translator for doctors. A few days ago, Bob took a spill on his front steps (wearing house slippers on ice is not a good idea) and bruised his back pretty badly. He saw me shoveling by the front door, so he peeked out to talk a bit. He was finely attired in an undershirt and boxers... of course his fly was open. I asked him how he was doing, and he gave me a full account of how he had hurt himself on the front steps last week. Well, as you may or may not know, no story about an injury is complete without showing off the scar or wound received from said event. So Bob starts to turn around and pull up his shirt while trying to hold the screen door open at the same time. He realizes that's not going to work, so he locks the door closer in place as to have free use of both hands. Both hands. That's when I realized what was about to happen. As he goes for his shirt with his left hand and his boxers with his right hand, I think to myself, "Am I really about to get mooned by an old man? Surely not. I'm practically a complete stranger. Surely, he wouldn't do.." And then it happened. I couldn't look away as the 72 year old, wrinkly, white, black, blue, green and purple behind was unveiled in all its glory before my unsuspecting eyes. He held his pose to make sure I got a good look, and all I could do was say, "Oh ya, that's bad". The conversation/exposition died pretty quickly after that, and I got right back to shoveling. Oh the joys of neighbors.

En Route

2009-02-02T23:28:00.004-06:00

I'm in Chicago right now slowly making my way to Maine. I first began my journey up north on Tuesday last week, only to have my attempt blocked. I knew the weather was calling for icy roads, but I wanted to try anyways. I made it a good 75 or 80 miles before I started to fishtail as I went over bridges. As I was coming to the TX/OK border, I saw a flashing sign saying that I-35 was closed ahead. So, I turned around after 90 miles and slip-slided my way back to Arlington. Nearly every overpass I went over for the next 15 or 20 miles, there was a car spun out that had hit the wall or went into the grass. I made it back without any mishaps, but it was obvious I would be waiting a couple days before I made another attempt. I woke up early again the next morning on the off chance the roads had cleared up, but all the news people were freaking out and talking to the audience like they were concerned parents. Finally, on Thursday morning, the roads cleared up sufficiently for me to go. I drove 10 hours through Oklahoma, Kansas and Nebraska before coming to my first stop, Council Bluffs, IA. I got to spend the evening with the Smiths who I was staying with that night. I enjoyed some good times playing with the kiddos, eating dinner and then going to downtown Omaha.

The next morning, I headed out around 8 after saying goodbyes and made my way across the entirety of Iowa and into Illinois until I reached my second destination, Chicago. I've enjoyed spending some good quality time with Mark, Katrina and Candice which has included good food, gallons of hot tea, and various excursions into the city. I was planning on leaving tomorrow morning, but it looks like it will be snowing across the U.S. between here and Maine for the next 2 days. So, my plan (for the moment) is to stick around a couple more days and leave for Bouckville, NY early, early Thursday morning. I'll be staying with Anne, my friend (from Alaska) Adam's mom and then drive the final leg to Sanford, ME Friday. I'm finding that driving 2000+ miles in the middle of winter is a little tricky, so I'm being patient and enjoying each opportunity I get for rest, quality time and productivity. I'm itching to begin my next season of life in Maine, but I'm not at all bitter I'm getting to spend time with good friends in the meantime.

I'm starting to get used to starting life practically from scratch over and over again. It's both exciting and tiresome. There's new freedom and discovery to be had, but a lot of patience and self discipline needed at the same time. Thankfully, that is the fruit of God's Spirit in us. I'm continually asking God if this pattern is what I should be expecting for the rest of my life. The answer seems to be 'yes' or at least 'for a while'. I'm okay with that, but with each move, I value the things I leave behind more and more. Still, I find so much freedom and power in letting go of what makes sense to my natural self and obediently walking with God. I am confident in God's transforming presence, knowing I am becoming a strong and loving man. I have only the faintest clue of what my new life will be like in Maine, but I know that surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life. That's all I need to know for now.

I'm a Rock Star

2009-01-27T20:17:00.003-06:00

I'm not really into New Year's resolutions, but I have decided to begin a year long project for 2009. As you may or may not know, I'm an aspiring musician. In order to continue growing and being disciplined in pursuit of that, I've decided to write one song per month about whatever is significant (or just interesting) in that month; a musical journal, if you will. This will be good motivation for me to finish at least one song a month and also push me to write about a broader range of subjects. It's nearing the end of January and so far, so good. I don't know if I'll share every month's song with the general public, but I am going to share the song for January with yall. It's about always being on the move and leaving behind people I love. So this one goes out to all my homies (and family). My myspace page is www.myspace.com/danielstinsonmusic. I also realize I am not the best annunciator and my mom couldn't understand me even if I was, so here's the lyrics:

Eastern Standard (January)

The evening air is filled with
The expectation of what this year brings
I know you said you'd better make it on this song
So listen as I sing

I'm so thankful for this time spent
These days have been a much needed relief
This autumn came and left me feeling isolated
I think you would agree

It's always warm in Texas
The winter months can hardly hold it down, I can't be held in place
I must leave in January or so I think

You've let me into your life
I'm sorry I can't stay
It seems I'm always on the run
Maybe you could hold my place
For when I return
I hope this is the case
There always is another town
You know that I can't stay

I've taken it for granted
I see it clear, I have acted selfishly
My friends and my family have always shown
Their love waits there for me

I could be happy in Chicago
I hope that I will make it on my way, I'd have a place to stay
The same goes for Alaska and my home state

You've let me into your life
I'm sorry I can't stay
It seems I'm always on the run
Maybe you could hold my place
For when I return
I hope this is the case
There always is another town
You know that I can't stay

Now I'm headed to the East Coast
My course is set, and I must follow through
But that doesn't mean that I won't
Miss your face, I always think of you
You know that I look forward to
When I can board that plane and come to see you
And if you're ever coming through, I will make room

You've let me into your life
I'm sorry I can't stay
It seems I'm always on the run
Maybe you could hold my place
For when I return
I hope this is the case
There always is another town

I won't you let go just because
I'm in another state
It's always good to hear your voice
And it's always worth the wait
Stay close to your phone
You know I stay up late
Eastern Standard can't keep me from
Staying wide awake

I'm (Going to Be) A Mainiac

2008-11-10T22:27:00.003-06:00

So... I moving to Maine. I finally know where I'm going next. I totally thought God was going to tell me what to do next before the end of the bike trip. Obviously, that was not the case. At that point, God lovingly slapped me upside the head and was like, "you haven't finished what I already told you to do!" I felt pretty lame about that and redoubled my efforts to complete my tasks. It was pretty ridiculous of me to think that I could just move right along to the next thing when I wasn't done preparing for it. Sheesh.

A week later, a missionary couple from Maine, the Godins, came down to stay with my parents. They've been working with Pleasant Ridge for several years now. One thing led to another (there was free food involved), and I ended up inviting myself to go hear them share with the missions committee. When they were sharing their struggles and joys, I had one of those moments. I can only call it the Spirit moving. I don't know if this is the way God works in your life, but for me, there are instants when I just know something. I don't necessarily understand it, but I am sure of it. That's what happened. I was like, "Of course I'm moving to Maine. Of course." It was the most obvious thing in the world. That night I didn't understand anything beyond the fact that I was going to move up there to serve the Godins. Everything had clicked in my spirit. My mind has been a little slower in coming around, but I'm slowly starting to see the wisdom and purpose of God (i.e. the last year of my life is making a whole lot more sense).

At this point, I'll hold off saying anything about what I think is going to happen. All I'm completely confident of is that God is moving as always.... and laughing at me, but I don't mind.

Revelations From the Saddle, Part 1: Creativity

2008-10-14T22:33:00.004-05:00

As promised, I'm going to share with you some of the interesting things I thought about/realized/were revelated upon me. Part of the awesomeness of the trip was getting into a focused rhythm and having very few distractions. For instance, I did not once get onto a computer. I normally check my email/facebook/myspace about 5 times a day, plus read blogs, news articles and the like. I also am a music monger. At some points in my life, I've listened to music averaging over 10 hours a day. That's when I was an accountant. I didn't bring any music with me whatsoever. All I had was what was in my head or playing at whatever diner we were at.

As a result, my imagination/creativity was going nuts, in a good way. Every night, I had at least 3 or 4 vivid dreams that I remembered in detail when I woke up. It was awesome! I was so intrigued by it that I wrote them down every day. One dream in particular, I felt like God was speaking to me through. That may be another post altogether.

Besides crazy dreams, my musical creativity was piqued. In those 3 weeks, I began writing 4 songs without even having a guitar as an aid. I've been writing songs since my junior year in college, and I usually don't even write 4 songs a year!

I came to the realization that my habit of passively taking in so much stimuli via Internet and music (I don't really watch much TV, but that fits, too), was essentially numbing my brain and stunting my creativity. That's a pretty big deal for me, because I feel like exercising my creativity, through music or other means, is a very real calling on my life and one of the ways that I reflect the image of God. Now that I'm aware of this consequence, you better believe I've cut back on Internet and music. It's been great. Not only have I been about %1000 more productive in songwriting, but when I do listen to music, I notice everything that's going on. I hear all the lyrics, what the drums, bass, and guitars are doing, etc.

If you hadn't picked up on it, I'm pretty excited about this and I'll hopefully have some of my music for y'all to listen to in the not so distant future. If I keep going like this, I'll finish an entire album's worth of songs during this year. Get excited.

Overview of the Bike Trip

2008-10-09T22:55:00.010-05:00

Man, I've had a really hard time putting the bike trip into words, especially story form. It's weird, because nothing exciting happened on the trip, in an event sense, yet the trip was amazing and most enjoyable. I'm going to try and tell you more than, "we rode from here to here in this many days and averaged this many miles" without going into every detail of where we slept, what we ate, who I talked to, what I felt, what I dreamed about, etc, because that would be pretty boring after about 3 days (like I said, it wasn't exciting as far as stuff happening). So I'm going to keep it to an overview for this blog and fill you in on important thoughts/dreams/revelations/themes in later blogs. Now that I've sufficiently danced around without actually writing about anything yet, here it goes...

Well, before I really get started, you can see pictures from the trip on my Facebook albums here and here. I pared it down from 350 pictures to 100.

OK. We left from DFW airport on the morning of September 4th. United airlines charged us $120 to fly our bikes! That's just immoral. On the way to Vancouver, we had a planned, 4 hour layover in Chicago, because I realized I could go see my friends, Mark and Katrina, for free! It was good to see them, as always. We and our bikes successfully made it to Canada in working order. After eating massive amounts of continental breakfastses, we assembled our bikes and hit the road the next morning from our hotel.
We had maps made by Adventure Cycling that we mostly followed on the trip. We had some trouble getting on route in Vancouver, especially with the construction and faulty directions from a stop sign holding guy. But, once we made it out of Vancouver it was smooth sailing. We didn't really didn't hit any big cities after that until San Francisco, 2 1/2 states later. It was quickly apparent I had aquired a nice little poison ivy allergic reaction the day before we left. That'll teach me to weed eat in shorts. It was also quickly apparent that my dad is a beast. I already knew this to be true, but it was reinforced after a couple days of biking, and every day henceforth.

The weather for the first few days in Washington was amazing. It was sunny and beautiful, but not too hot. The natives thought it was burning up, but it felt quite pleasant compared to the upper 90's in Texas. On day five, my left knee started hurting a little. We adjusted the left pedal position which seemed to help... for about half a day. My knee would end up being a problem the rest of the trip, but it didn't keep me from enjoying the trip.On day 7, we made it to Oregon and decided to take a day off in Astoria. I think it's safe to say that the Oregon coast trumps the Washington coast. The rocky cliffs and beaches are so beautiful, like this:

We met my friend Dan, in Newport on the 14th. He's a totally rad guy that I know from my time in Alaska who's down in Oregon for seminary. Towards southern Oregon, we got into some chilly/foggy weather. We were disappointed, because we couldn't see the ocean most of the day. On the 18th, we made it to California. Northern California lived up to our expectations. Both of our favorite days of the trip were going through the redwood forrest along the Ave of Giants. There will definitely be an entire blog about this day in the future.

I'll sum it up for now by saying that there are awesome, massive trees and an ease for connecting with God. That day changed my life and the way I see the Creation.

The best day of the trip was followed by the hardest day of the trip. We started around a couple hundred feet above sea level and went up and down until we made it to 2000 ft. above sea level. This was followed by 5 or so miles of racing downhill riding the brakes half the time to keep from flying off the road. It was nuts. We ended the day with 5400 ft. of vertical climbing over 70 miles. So tired. We had a couple 87 mile/day days after that which were just gorgeous.

After 11 days of straight riding, we took a day off in Corte Madera (which means something like "cut wood" in Spanish). On my day off, I realized I was just about out of money. Whoa. The next morning, I talked over with my dad whether I should borrow from him and keep going or rent a car in San Francisco and call it good. After praying about it, we both felt pretty good about stopping a week early, so that's exactly what we did. We had pretty much accomplished what we had set out to do. So we rented a car and drove the 1800 miles back to Arlington straight through the night in 30 hours.

Funny story. When we decided to come back early, we played with the idea of not telling people we were back yet, so that we could be sneaky and stuff. So we told my mom to not tell anyone. She told my brother and sister, not thinking to tell them not to not tell anyone. I mean, it's not like my brother was hanging out with a bunch of my friends in Abilene that next day or my sister was hanging out with some of my friends in Dallas the day after that. Oh ya, no one's going to find out. So ya, a lot of my friends knew I was coming back early before we hit Texas. Good times.

We're Back

2008-09-29T20:52:00.002-05:00

It'd be hard to try and sum up what happened in the last few weeks in a single blog entry, so I'm not going to try. I'm just going to write about it as it comes. I still have a lot left to process and figure out how to put into words. So hold your horses, and it'll surely flow. I mostly just wanted to let everyone know that we're back safe and sound. It was a great, life-changing adventure. More to come soon.

Cycling Monk

2008-09-02T13:14:00.006-05:00

It is almost here. It's less than 2 days until my dad and I board a plane for Vancouver. As you can see, our heads and faces are now ready for the trip. Like any other time you make a plan for months in advance, it seems so far away until it's right on you. It's only 4 weeks of my life, but it feels much more epic than just another month of being alive. That might seem obvious, because I'm going on an adventure that few people get to experience. But, it's not just that. I can't explain it very well, but I have a feeling that something momentous is going to happen. Now that I think about it, I had a similar feeling before I left for Ecuador. I don't mean to freak you out by saying that. I don't have an expectation of any sort of bodily harm. I guess I could sum it up by saying that I'm expectant and excited about the potential of this trip. Because of the nature of what we're doing, there's going to be so much space and time to listen to, know and move with God. In order to further facilitate that function, I'm planning on doing a fast of sorts for those 4 weeks. Essentially, I'm going to take a break from everything that is not within arms reach. This means I'm doing away with phones, TVs, movies, and internet (and cars, too). I'll be sort of a cycling monk, living simply and fully where I am. In this time, I don't want to miss anything that's going on around me. I want to be completely available to see, hear, do and say. Just to be completely honest with you, I will have my cell phone with me. I'll have to make a call or 2 to hook up with my friend Dan in Oregon. Other than that, it will remain off unless I absolutely need it for an emergency or something. I won't be checking my voice mail or text messages no matter what. I know you're probably disappointed that you won't be able to keep up with my trip via blog, but don't worry. I'm keeping a journal on the trip, and I'll post blogs about my trip when I get back. It'll be like a game show on TV where they tape the whole series in a matter of days and then show them over the next few weeks.

So, yes, I am very excited about my trip and all that will happen in the month of September. You'll hear from me again when I return.

Exhale. Inhale.

2008-08-19T20:23:00.003-05:00

I have officially left Abilene. My last few weeks there were odd. First of all, it started when I drove back from the airport, upon returning from Alaska. I think it was the first time I had ever entered Abilene with little feeling of any kind. Countless other trips down I-20 West found me feeling expectant, nervous, tired, happy, nostalgic, anxious, excited, disappointed, restless or content. This time was strangely void of any such emotion. At the moment I realized this, I pondered what it could mean. The only conclusion I could come to was that God was showing me I was completely done with a season in my life. That seemed to square with everything God has been showing me. I expected to coast through my last couple of weeks without incident. I would say goodbye to people, finish my last 2 weeks at Los Arcos and quietly transition towards the ride, all in one big exhale.

All those things did happen. I had friends over for pizza, I diligently completed 2 more weeks as a waiter, my brother and I watched the last episode of a TV series (Babylon 5) we had been working our way through for months, and I packed. In the midst of all those endings, there were unexpected beginnings. I suddenly realized how much I loved the handful of recovering addicts I worked with. While I was gone to Alaska, they hired another white guy to replace me (making him the 3rd white male to EVER work at Los Arcos (me being the 2nd)) and we became friends. On my last day, I realized I really wanted to continue friendships with those people (but not continue working there) and somehow continue to be a part of their healing and growing. My church trickled back from their summer travels, and I was excited to see them. As I heard tales of their summers and the ways God was moving in their lives, I discovered I was sad I wasn't going to get to join them on a daily basis in walking out our faith in the coming months. I also found I had a new appreciation for friends that I've had for years and valued them more now than I had back when I was, perhaps, a little more focused on myself. On top of that, I made new friends and saw potential for great things. And then I did the dishes, removed my house key, took a deep breath and left.

So now I'm in Arlington for a couple weeks, working with my dad and hanging with family and friends before I head up to Canada. My season of preparation and isolation is pretty much over. I feel satisfied that I have been obedient to God's calling for this summer. Consequently, I feel prepared for what's next. Though I don't know what I'm doing once I've trekked across the U.S., I'm at peace and feel perfectly positioned to move with God in that new direction when He gives the word. It's going to be interesting for sure.

My First Century

2008-08-09T21:44:00.001-05:00

I finally completed my first 100 mile ride today. Good thing, too, because that's what we're going to be riding pretty much everyday down the west coast, which is in less than 4 weeks! It looks like I'll also be riding the Hotter Than Hell Hundred in 2 weeks up in Wichita Falls with my dad. I can't be any hotter than it was today.

Bachelor Party + Kabobs - Flat Tire = Bear Chase

2008-08-04T22:44:00.005-05:00

I'm back from Alaska and trying to get back to my routine. I'm tired now, but my trip was great. I got to see almost everyone I wanted to see. I went all over the place: Anchorage, Girdwood, Seward, Eklutna Lake, Hatcher Pass and everywhere in between. I also got to eat at all my favorite restaurants: Coast Pizza, Jack Sprat, Burger Cache, Moose's Tooth, and Gwenie's. The wedding was fun and the weather, though mostly rainy, was most enjoyable. I could bore you with all the details of my trip, but I'll just tell you a good Alaskan bachelor party tale instead and call it a day.

On a cloudy Thursday night, 6 bachelors (1 of them soon-not-to-be) gathered at the Chugiak house to do what must be done. After fiddling with an assortment of bikes, finally six were found (or made) worthy of riding, and the quest could begin. The grocery store would provide the remainder of our trip's necessities. We had in mind a simple list upon arrival, but as you may know, six men with food on the brain can quickly go astray. Somehow just hot dogs and bagels turned into hot dogs, bagels, 2 kinds of cream cheese, 12 kabobs in 4 varieties, a box of cookies, an apple pie, a summer sausage and some beverages to wash it all down. $100 later, we were again on the road to our final destination: The Eklutna Lake Cabin.

We careened up a mountainous path with tires squealing and engines a-chugging. It was getting towards 7 p.m. when we finally reached the trail head and got our packs on. We mounted our steeds of varying trustworthiness in anticipation of mounds of food cooked over a raging bonfire. It was quickly apparent that Woodsen's front tire would not last the 12 mile journey. The valve was busted and required a little prodding, poking, and fiddling, plus more air every mile or 2. He and I ended up falling far behind the rest of the food-crazed pack... and that's when the bears came... DUN, DUN, DUNNNN!!!!

As we quickly rounded a corner, trying in vain to catch the other guys, what would we behold but 3 bears: A mother and her 2 cubs! If you don't know anything about bears, you don't want to run across a momma bear with her kids. They tend to be a little protective. We quickly squeezed the brakes with force, sliding on the gravel to a complete stop. After whooping and hollering at the bears, they retreated back into the woods, much to our relief. When we could no longer hear anything romping around in the woods, we felt it safe to continue on. Not too much further down the trail, it was time for another tire fix. I would be lying if I were to say that I wasn't thinking about the bears we had just left behind and the raw meat strapped to my back.

Sure enough, after a minute or 2, here came the bears moseying down the trail towards us. We again entered another session of whooping and hollering, this time adding some rock throwing to the mix, but the bears kept coming ever so slowly. I got a tad bit nervous. When it was apparent we weren't scary enough to deter the bears, Woodsen got back to fixing the tire, while I continued putting on a show. They kept coming, and Woodsen started pumping. When the bears were still a good 40 feet away, Woodsen finished and we rode on in haste leaving our new friends behind none too soon for my taste.

We made it safely to the cabin, having to walk the last 4 miles, as the tire finally and completely gave out. Good times were indeed had by all, and mounds of food cooked over a raging (okay, mild-mannered) bonfire were indeed consumed. And then came the snoring... DUN, DUN, DUNNNN!!!!

CanAmeXico

2008-07-21T14:07:00.003-05:00

I'm sitting at my parents' house in Arlington, relaxing a bit before I head out to Alaska tonight. I'll be there for the next ten days. I'm pretty excited to see friends I haven't seen in over a year and enjoy the beauty of the Alaskan summer. And it will be in the 40's when I get there. That sounds so wonderful right now. Following that, I'll have 2 more weeks in Abilene before I "visit" my parents for the remaining 3 weeks before the CanAmeXican Ride. After much deliberation, I decided to go ahead and leave Abilene a little sooner than I had anticipated. The major deciding factor was that Chris is moving back into the house August 16th or 17th. So it was either move or try and cram my stuff in with my brother's stuff in his room. I broke the news to my boss at Los Arcos yesterday and I'm breaking the news to the rest of you now. So I'll have plenty of planning time with my dad before we fly out. We just bought our tickets last night for the flight to Vancouver, BC on September 4th. We'll wait to buy our return tickets from San Diego, CA until we're halfway through the ride. We're estimating it'll take us about a month. So I'll be all over the place in the next couple months. Beginning October 1st, I have no idea what I'm doing with my life. Any suggestions?

A Frustrating Afternoon

2008-07-08T17:37:00.002-05:00

I set out to ride 55 miles miles yesterday. A few miles down the road, I decided I would ride 40. Then I decided to ride 60. Then somewhere along the way I became very confused and decided to ride 90. To top things off I decided I would even stretch for a few more miles to hit an even 100. At 45 miles, I got a flat and it wasn't fixable. So I threw on my spare. At mile 72, I got another flat. I patched it, but it was already flat again by the time I got to my rest stop at mile 75. I decided that the hole was more than I could conquer, despite still feeling quite feisty, and I was out of spares. I threw in the towel and went for my phone to call for a ride... only discover there was no phone to be found. I had used it back in Cross Plains at mile 45 of the trip and apparently left it sitting on the table at Subway. Lame. A guy offered to let me borrow his phone and then offered me a ride back to Abilene. I accepted. It turned out that he's the dad of one of my friends from ACU, Kendra. Weird. I called the Subway to see if they had found it, and they hadn't. I guess someone jacked it. The person who stole it had to figure out that it would be useless to them after about 2 days when the phone died. That's just being plain inconsiderate. So, I'm back to my old phone minus all of my phone numbers. Unless you give me your number again, don't be offended if I don't call you ever again. So ya, yesterday was a frustrating day.

In other news, I started learning how to play the drums a couple days ago. My friend Drew is being kind enough to teach me and let me use his set. The first song I'm learning is "Brain Stew" by Green Day. If it weren't for that bass pedal, the song would be easy. Drums are harder to play than you would think.

Miles and Miles of Bubble Wrap

2008-07-05T22:52:00.002-05:00

Pop.
Pop pop.
Pop POP pop pop POP pop.
Pop.

I started to get a little worried and adjusted the Gatorade bottle.

POP POP POP pop pop pop.
pop. pop. POP POp. PoP. POP. POP POP POP POP.
Pop pop pop POP. Pop.

This was not normal. 25 miles into my 60 mile ride, I was sure my tires were about to disintegrate mid pedal. I stopped and inspected my bike. Everything seemed to be in working order. I hopped back on.

Pop. POP pop pop POPOPOPPOPOOPOPOPPOPPOPOPPOPOPP.

What the?!?!

I stopped again and called my dad thinking he would surely know. He did. Apparently, when the asphalt gets hot enough, it gets covered in tiny little air bubbles. Weird. Assured that this paved rapid-fire-machine-gun popping was normal, I continued on my way enjoying the thought of riding over miles of bubble wrap.

Pop. pop pop pop pop POP Pop poP PoP pOp POP pop pop pop. POP.

Alaska, Here I Come!

2008-06-29T18:28:00.003-05:00

I just bought my plane tickets for my little vacation to Alaska. My friends, John and Becca, are getting married, so I'm going up for the wedding and to hang out with friends. I'll be there July 21-31. I'm pretty dang excited. Get me out of this Texas heat!

FINALLY (Four Useful Words)

2008-06-26T16:05:00.008-05:00

Finally, it has happened. The numerous phone calls, hours on hold, serenades by awful elevator music, transfers from answerless claims representative to answerless claims representative, stacks of mail, monthly payments, and endless frustrations have finally come to an end. The insurance company finally reimbursed us for the Ecuadorian medical expenses from nearly a year ago. I've been waiting for that money to pay off the remaining bills from in the U.S. You don't know how happy I was to be able to call up people I still owed money to and finally pay them off. I am so relieved. This whole time we were only missing four seemingly innocuous words said in just the right order: Texas Department of Insurance. As soon as they heard those four wonderful words, the insurance company suddenly knew exactly which claim we were talking about, knew what currency is used in Ecuador (US dollars), could translate the claim from Spanish to English, and even send a check that same week. Hmmm... very curious. Nothing like a little motivation to promote productivity! Don't get me wrong. I'm so thankful I had insurance at the time, but equally, if not more, thankful I won't have to talk to them again (well, hopefully not any time soon). So, if you're ever getting the run-around from an insurance company, remember these four feared and useful words: Texas Department of Insurance.

Note: if you live in another state, you may need to call your own state's board of insurance.

I Found the Hills

2008-06-09T15:11:00.005-05:00

I began by checking the weather. Threat of thunderstorms in the afternoon. Wind from the south. Next, Google maps. No, not that one. Not that way. Wait. It could be. Maybe. Diversion here, change there. Aaaand yes... it's perfect. I checked the time. Ten thirty. Oh no, that means... I quickly did the calculations, accounting for distance, wind, stops and potential threats. That's what I thought: 5:30. I pulled out the phone and begrudgingly pressed the correct keys finishing with "save". I did a double take. Yes, 5:30 a.m. as in "the morning".

I tried to get out a little energy by playing guitar for a bit. No luck. I got into bed fully awake, praying I would somehow fall instantly to sleep and become wide awake again at 5:30 a.m. I put on The Working Title's About Face and popped in the headphones. As the final song on the album ended, I was thinking there was no way. I resisted the urge to change my alarm right then and there.

I heard this annoying buzzing and organs softly beginning to play. It was "Marching Bands of Manhattan" playing on my phone alarm. How and why? I peaked through a crack in the blinds. The sky was just starting to show some color. Ya right! Not a chance! Changed the alarm to 7:30. I closed by eyes expecting to be hearing Death Cab playing once again my next conscious moment. Nope. Just lied there. It seems I had received the second part of my prayer. I was thrilled (read sarcastically).

The oatmeal with crunchy peanut butter and honey mixed in was tasty as usual. Can't go wrong. The water had that same old off flavor you come to expect in Abilene. I filled my CamelBak with the same water after breakfast and donned my cycling gear, yes, even the spandex shorts. They're a necessary evil. As I put on and tightened my recently acquired Keen cycling sandals, I pondered upon the tan line conglomeration that was beginning to come in from the combination of my Keens, Chacos, flipflops and ankle socks. "Cool." Yes, deep thoughts at 6:30 a.m. Checked the tires, made sure all necessary tools and spare parts were in their respective homes, tucked some snacks, money, a hand-drawn map and cell phone into my pack and headed out the door.

I was about to ride 80 miles.

Despite it being only 75, the humidity forced a sweat to break quickly. Oh, Texas. My first destination was Oplin, TX. I passed Shotwell, Nelson Park, The Abilene Zoo and the Abilene Regional Airport and headed south on highway 36.

Good Idea: Keeping nasal passages clear and free during aerobic outings for optimal intake of oxygen.
Bad Idea: Farmer's blow at 15 mph against a 25 mph head wind.

There was little in sight besides a handful of cemeteries, cows and hills. So many hills. I rolled slowly into Oplin looking for my first rest stop: the Jot-Um Down store. I can only imagine it was named this many years ago when people were on the honor system and would just jot-um down and pay later. Who knows? After passing by the school gym turned "The Grand Ole Oplin", I spotted it on the right. I knew I was about to have a cultural experience. I was most definitely a house at one point. It looked dark inside, but the sign said 'open', and it didn't seem a place like this would overlook such a detail. I pulled the screen door finding no resistance. It took a minute for my eyes and ears to adjust to the darkness and blaring TV. I realized there was someone sitting behind a desk. The dim light from the window revealed an elderly woman in her 80's dressed in a night gown. I was relieved to see she was also wearing shorts. I gave her the cheeriest 'hello' I could muster and she responded with, "The sodie-pops are over there", as she pointed to the fridge in the corner. I took her cue and walked that direction. I found a Gatorade and went in search of a snack. The aged owner was not content to let me look on my own. She started telling me where the apple pies, peanuts, chips, etc. were and pointed as if I could actually see and understand what she was telling me. I politely nodded and made agreeable noises as I dodged and weaved through boxes and shelves occupying the 10x10 food area. As I perused the selection, I caught a sound byte from the TV saying, "I know he goes to church, but does he gooo to church?". Not sure what that was all about. It was something from the 60's I think.

I made my decision and gave her the $3.40 she asked for. She then began asking me about where I was riding from/to, if I was in school, where I worked and why I was riding so far, etc. She raised her eyebrows, shook her head and tilted back in her chair all flabbergasted when I answered her final question. I never get tired of that response from people. She then advised me that I should go back up 604 to 36 and take that east to 283 instead of going down 2926 so that I could go around all them big hills. I assured her I needed the practice, thinking she was exaggerating as I assume all near senile people do, and she agreed it would be hilly in the Northwest. After finishing my drink and snack, I asked to use her bathroom. She gave me weird instructions that went something like, "Go out back. Go ta yer left. Pull the hook out and close the curt'un. Make sure you stay until the toilet stops runnin." Confused, I nodded as if I understood exactly what she meant and went through the back screen door hoping I could make sense of it later. Did I mention there was no AC?

I spotted a metal flat-roofed storage building. It indeed had a hook running through 2 holes keeping it shut. I pulled it out, peaking in to make sure it was the bathroom. I ducked in through the door and tried to close the door behind me. Wasn't gonna happen. Guess that's what the curtain's for. I did what I had come there to do, made sure the toilet stopped and then exited, finding out when the store's normally open on my way out. Mon.-Sat. 6 am-5 pm. Back to riding.

Ya, about those hills... She was right. Wow, she was right.

They were the kind of hills where you brake on the way down and hit 35 mph against the wind and then struggle to keep a 5 mph pace on the way up. As I undulated between hanging on to my handlebars for dear life and chugging and puffing, I thought that maybe the elderly woman was more with it than I had given her credit. As I just barely made it up the 4th or 5th hill (I had lost count), I conceded that she was in fact more sensible than I was. I was only 35 miles into the ride and already my muscles were burning. This wasn't looking good.

Thankfully, that was the last of the monstrous hills for awhile, and I reaped the benefit of my labor as I coasted for most of the next 7 or 8 miles. I made it to Baird, now 60 miles into my ride, without a hitch. I decided to go ahead 6 more miles to Clyde before I stopped, because there's a gas station with a Subway in it that I like to stop at. I saw I was approaching another big uphill, but it didn't seem near as steep or tall as I had remembered. Wonder why?

I was elated as I pulled into the gas station in Clyde. I needed some food, Powerade and at least 30 minutes rest before I made the final push back to Abilene. As usual, the gas station attendant was curious about my riding, and when she realized how far I was riding, exclaimed, "Are you training for that Ter da Fraaance?" Man, I love small town folk.

As I rode the final 14 miles, I got sprinkled on a bit, but there was nothing of the thunderstorms they were predicting. I made my way into Abilene and down EN 10th, then heard a repetitive "ch" sound coming from one of my wheels. I thought it was something caught in my spokes rubbing against the frame as it made each rotation. No, it was a flat. A half mile from my house, I got a flat. Not letting a little thing like that get me down, I made the tired and triumphant walk back to my house as I my bike rolled along beside me. I was just thankful it hadn't happened 50 miles ago. Done and done.

...and then I went and played (and won) 3 games of racquetball.

THE END

Inbetween

2008-06-07T12:35:00.003-05:00

Just as I was beginning to feel a little at home in Abilene, everything got all turned around again. Many of the people I've grown closest to here have recently departed (or are about to depart) for other cities, jobs and lives. This includes college friends, coworkers, my church and new friends. It's just starting to hit me. I can now count on one hand the people I have more than a skin-deep relationship with here in Abilene. Though I'm here until the end of August (as far as I know), I already feel like I'm between here and the next place. That disconnected feeling makes it hard to find reason to invest and construct. The things I have to do over the next few months seem to be already pulling me away. It's going to be a trying summer.

Back to Grayskull

2008-06-02T09:24:00.003-05:00

"The prodigal son returns!" I exclaimed, as I once again entered the doors of the mighty Grayskull as one of its inhabitants. Josh just sat there looking all confused and said, "What?" I said, "Nevermind."

And that's how it all began again...

She Took the Bait

2008-05-23T12:53:00.003-05:00

They caught her. My boss set a trap and she totally fell into it. It was the girl I had accused. I feel pretty relieved and a little vindicated, but at the same time, more sad than anything else. I don't think I'm supposed to know all of what's going on, so I don't feel I can share it on my blog. All I'll say is that this girl is caught up in bad stuff and it's taking over and ruining her life. I've felt such a heavy burden over the last few days to pray for her. I don't know that I'll ever see her again, but I really wish I could help her. It hurts to see the enemy bringing death to those around me and feel helpless to stop it. I pray that we, as God's holy ones, will be equipped with righteous weapons to face and defeat the enemy. So be it.

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly...

2008-05-18T23:30:00.008-05:00

My second day back from vacation was an interesting one. It didn't have anything to do with having a busy night at work (it was) or comical customers (there were). A few hours into my Saturday night shift I (*AH-E-AH-E-AHH* the GOOD) saw something strange and suspicious. On my way back to the kitchen from a table who needed something, I looked to my left, across 3 tables, towards my now vacant table #18. I was beginning to plan my next few minutes thinking of when I was going to clear off that table when I saw the new waitress standing by it. But, she wasn't just standing. I saw her slide her hand off the table and slip it into her apron pocket (*AH-E-AH-E-AHH* the BAD). Just as her hand entered her pocket, I passed into the next section and didn't see anything else. I did a double take only to see wall. Did she really just take the tip from my table? I wasn't completely sure, but the next time I saw her, I nonchalantly asked if she'd taken the tip off my table, thinking she was planning on giving it to me or something. She said she was just grabbing napkins. Hmmm... I did not see any napkins in her hands. I wasn't completely sure of what I had seen, so I continued on my way. Maybe the customers had left my tip at the register. Nope, they hadn't.

As the night progressed, I noticed there were 2 or 3 other tables I didn't get a tip from. It is a rare thing that I get completely stiffed, much less multiple times in one shift. It just so happened that I had actually seen the customer leave the tip on one of the now tipless tables. They were some of my regulars who I'm on a first-name basis with and pray for me every time I wait on them. At that point, I was completely sure someone was stealing my tips, and I had a pretty good idea of who it was. To top things off, another server asked me if I had cleaned off her table. Apparently, she had seen the customer leave the tip as he complimented her on a job well done, and then it was gone when she came back to clean the table.

After hearing that, I went into plan mode. I began thinking and praying about how I should proceed. The first passage I thought of was Luke 6:28-30: Bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. So first off, I knew my objective shouldn't be to try and get my money from her.

The next verse I thought of was Matthew 18:15: If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. I wasn't sure that she exactly fit into what Jesus was talking about as your "brother", but I decided I should confront her about it nonetheless. I waited until close to closing time so that I could talk to her without others hearing. I don't think I ended up saying it very well, but I pretty much asked her why she was stealing my tips and offered her more money if she wanted it. She fervently denied any such activities. I guess I was actually expecting her to come clean. I don't know why. She walked away mad. I continued cleaning up, and I could hear her telling the cashier that I had just accused her and the reasons why she didn't need to steal. A couple minutes later I heard her saying the same thing to another server. I've got to be honest. The tiny sliver of doubt I had that she was the thief swelled. I began second guessing myself, wondering if I had done the right thing or hastily accused an innocent person.

When I got off, I called my family and a couple friends to get their wisdom and advice. I was pretty sure I needed to talk to my boss about it even if I had accused the wrong person. If I was wrong, she needed to know there was a thief. There was only 1 other person it could be, but she had worked there for the better part of 4 years.... and had just got out of jail... again. Okay, so maybe she had a few strikes against her, too (*AH-E-AH-E-AHH* the UGLY). My family and friends confirmed what I had been thinking and gave me a bigger scope of things to consider. I needed to tell my boss.

I showed up to work early so I could talk with my boss before the other servers were around. She wasn't there yet. She arrived a half hour later and asked me what had happened last night. She had heard from the cashier who just happens to be one of her daughters. I gave her the rundown of what I had seen. In a roundabout way, she basically said she believed me and would also suspect the new waitress considering who was working. She said that she didn't even think that girl would come back. She did. She strolled in as if nothing had happened. Ya, I felt pretty awkward considering the previous night's happenings. The next day, there was a hand-written sign put up in back saying something to the affect of, "To all waitstaff, Someone has been stealing and we know who you are. You should just leave and not wait to get caught and embarrassed... Thanks" Wow, so tactful. That girl kept coming to work. A couple days later, I found out that the other girl who had been stolen from thought it was the ex-con (some customers had maybe seen her do something suspicious), not the girl I had accused. I talked to my boss and apparently she doesn't know which one it was. The sign was a bluff. Gotta love it.

So, I've just been workin away waiting for the deviant to get caught in the act. It's been weird, because both of the suspects have been acting like I'm their best friend. So strange. I don't know what to do at this point but love them. I don't know if I'll find out who it was, but I don't care much anymore. It's just money afterall.

If you didn't understand The Good, the Bad and the Ugly references, you really need to go watch that movie. Love. It. Great Clint Eastwood western. I'll even let you borrow it, you dirty son of a AH-E-AH-E-AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Seattle Rundown

2008-05-10T11:03:00.004-05:00

I just woke up from an 11 and 1/2 hour slumber. Oh dear goodness, yes. What a great way to end my vacation... well, sort of. I did work a lunch shift yesterday, but had last night off, so it still feels like I'm on vacation. I know you're all just dying to know exactly what I did during my Seattle trip, so I'll give you the complete rundown (as best I can remember).

Sunday: see my last blog.

Monday: Slept in and then Ross and I went to this excellent Thai place called Djan. I highly recommend the Curry Chicken. Oooooh, so good. Next, we headed to the U-district to hit some thrift stores. I was pretty surprised by the Seattle thrifting scene. Apparently, used clothing is so cool there that they think they can charge real-clothes prices. Lame. I couldn't find anything under my $5 limit. I definitely saw a pearl snap shirt, which Wal-Mart sells around $10 new, selling for $17 used! No thanks. So we hit up one of Ross' favorite coffee shops, Zoka's, and he studied while I wasted time on the Internet. Then we headed to an intramural Ultimate Frisbee game, and they even let me play! Despite not much digging of the long ball, we won, finishing out an undefeated season for them. Since it was Cinco de Mayo, of course we went out to celebrate. We tried to go to a place that had a live band, but there was a huge wait. So we ended up going to Jalisco's. I had suspected, but became fully aware that I have become a Mexican food snob. Their Huevos Rancheros were not up to (Los Arcos) par. After getting blasted by Latino music for a while, we moved a couple doors down to Pies and Pints to hang out, then headed home.

Tuesday: Ross had a class breakfast thingy, so I walked down the street to the Rusty Pelican to eat breakfast all by me onesy. Next, we grabbed a bus downtown to check out Pike's Place Market. We didn't buy anything, but we did get free samples and get to see the fish guy heckle onlookers who were obviously there to see the show and not purchase any fish. We proceeded to wander around downtown in hopes of finding an ever-elusive Goodwill where normally priced used clothing abounds. No luck. Defeated, we ate some sub par Chinese and made our way back home via bus. Greta and her sister Heidi came over and we did a little jamming, playing some of our original songs, before getting pizza at Romios. We then headed over to the Tractor to catch a couple bands, J. Tillman and The Monahans. J. Tillman was pretty sweet, playing low-key acoustic folk. The Monahans, from Austin, sounded like the Wallflowers but not as good.

Wednesday: Ross decided he actually needed to go to class, so I spent the morning back at Zoka's getting some stuff done. We met up for a late lunch at the Ram, then hit a used music store before I joined him for his Emergency Medicine class. Fitting. I was surprised by how practical and not-above-my-head the class was. The prof was pretty funny, too. We even talked about wound care, which I could validate some of the info firsthand. Next was a surprise party for Teja that involved a homemade Puerto Rican dish and birthday cake. The plan was to go to swing dancing, which somehow turned into going to Babalu, where they were doing some kind of Cuban dancing I had never heard of.

Thursday: We drove down to the town of North Bend to do some hiking. We wandered around for quite a while before finally finding the Snoqualmie Falls, the ranger station and finally, the Little Si trail head. It turned out to be an easy, 5 mile round trip hike. It wasn't anything amazing, but quite enjoyable all the same. On our way out of town we hit Twede's Cafe for some burgers and shakes. The Breakfast Burger was quite tasty. After a much-needed nap we went to Ross' intramural soccer game. They also won their game, making them undefeated. We finished things off by watching In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale. Wow. I don't care who you are. That was a bad movie. But, it was bad in the cheesy-great-guy-night-movie kind of way. It featured a myriad of lesser Hollywood stars including one of my favorites, Jason Statham. It was one of those movies you just can't believe made it to theaters. Oh how. A great way to end a great trip.

I flew out around midnight and got into DFW at 5 a.m. Mark was gracious enough to pick me up me up at 6:30 so that I could make it back for the lunch shift. I ended up getting about an hour of sleep during the car trip back to Abilene, making a total of 1 hr 8 min the entire night. Ya, I can't sleep on planes, especially when a middle-eastern man is trying to cuddle with me. It was a great trip, but I'm glad to be back to being productive again.

The Shouldbe Birthday Rule

2008-05-05T17:40:00.007-05:00

I've never really made a big deal out of birthdays before. At most I usually hang out with friends and maybe get a meal payed for. This year has been quite atypical. I had 3 birthday parties in 3 days. It all started on Friday when some of my friends, who are part of my church, threw me a post-work-Lord-of-the-Rings-turned-fiesta-complete-with-dinosaur-birthday-cake party in Abilene at 10 p.m. after I worked a double at Los Arcos. It was a small gathering of Abilene folk. The only thing that came close to equaling the excitement of plastic dinosaurs cohabitating with 25 burning wax candles on my b-day cake was being treated to a viewing of a homemade, cheesy, err, I mean, quite well-made scary movie with Erica starring as the frightened babysitter. Quality. We capped the night off with a game of Cranium. There's no need to talk about the outcome of said game.

On Saturday, my birthday eve, after a few games of ultimate frisbee and football, Jonathan and I headed to Arlington for birthday celebration #2. Before the festivities started, my dad, brother and I squeezed in a trip to R.E.I., because I was in desperate need of some cycling shoes/a birthday present. After much debate, I ended up going with some Keen cycling sandals, just in case you were wondering. Man, I love not having to wear socks. Upon return to my parents' house, my family and a couple of my friends ate a quite enjoyable dinner of homemade chicken tenders, Strychnine fries, green bean casserole, tomatoes and red velvet cake. Mmm, so good. Oh ya, I guess I should mention that we were also celebrating my sister's birthday from the day before. It was good times and great oldies all around and ended before the party from the night before had even started. Don't get me wrong, I didn't mind. I had to get up early in the morning.

On Sunday, my actual birthday, my parents gave me a ride to the airport at 6 a.m. not forgetting to sing their annual Happy Birthday Duet. I hopped on the plane to Seattle and arrived by 9:30. We went to church where Ross goes, then grabbed some Gyros and took off for Exit 38 for a mile or 2 hike to my first ever rock climbing site.
(That's me!)
Admittedly, I've never been a huge fan of heights, which would probably be the reason I had never been rock climbing before. I'm pretty much over letting fear keep me from enjoying life or doing something of value, so I decided it was about time. The rope was already set up for a 5.9 climb (translation: not exactly easy, but not terribly difficult for someone who's climbed before) so I decided I'd give 'er a go after seeing Ross go up first. I made it 2/3 of the way, so I was pretty proud of myself. My hands were shot after that. I belayed Ross on his next climb and then watched the other climbers for a bit before hiking down and heading back into town for dinner. A successful first climbing experience all around.

We went over to the house of a family who the dad is in med school with Ross. They're so great. Their 3 kids were hilarious and couldn't get enough of playing with Ross and me. I even got to jump on a trampoline for the first time in I don't know how many years. As if that weren't enough, for dinner, they made steak, Alaskan king crab, shrimp, scallops, fries (which caught on fire), salad, and birthday brownies in a heart-shaped pan. Wow. I couldn't believe they made all that for a complete stranger's birthday. They're such generous people. After exchanging stories for a while and getting in one more game of pentagonal-barbie-dodge-baseball with the kids, we ended the night watching Brick back at Ross' place. Not a bad way to spend your birthday (and the 2 days proceeding it). I think I've officially decided that it should be a rule that you take a vacation on your birthday every year. We'll see how that works out for me next year.

Bolillos, Güeros y Gringos, ¡Ay Mio!

2008-04-30T16:16:00.012-05:00

I asked to get off early from work yesterday to go pick up Mark and Katrina at the airport in Dallas. After deciding on a plan of action, my boss started asking questions about if I usually stop anywhere and how long I stay in the Metroplex when I go. After a few more questions, she asked me if I ever went to the Mexican bakery. Of course, I said no and she just couldn't believe it. Not going to the Mexican bakery when in the Metroplex did not fit into her world view. When she got over the shock of me never having graced a Mexican bakery with my presence, she started talking about how her family always goes when they're in town, because apparently the bread at the Mexican bakery here in Abilene isn't near as good or long lasting. At that point, I knew what was coming. Sure enough, she asked if I wanted to stop by a store and pick her and some others a certain kind of bread. She wanted some "pan bolillo". Her and a couple waitresses started giggling. They started talking rapidly in Spanish and laughing so that I couldn't understand what they were saying. Finally, they came out and said that pan bolillo loosely translates to "white bread" and "bolillo" is also slang for a white person. For instance, once might say, "Trabajo con dos bolillos", meaning, "I work with 2 white people". She quickly defended herself saying that she doesn't use the term. I guess it's not a nice thing to say. Nevertheless, she and the other servers were giggling away. Sending a bolillo to pick up some pan bolillo. Very funny. So I agreed, and she told me where in Ft. Worth the bakery is.

I googled it and found it using Street View, then headed out. As I exited 820 and made my way south down Main Street, it was as if I drove into another country. I was not aware that part of Ft. Worth was so steeped in the Mexican culture. Most of the signs were in Spanish and there weren't many gringos in sight. I easily found the store and wondered around inside until I found the baked goods. There they were, just as my boss had described, labeled "Bolillo". I tonged 20 bolillos into plastic sacks and headed to the register as confused customers looked on. Sadly, the cashier spoke English and I didn't bust out my Spanish. Mission accomplished.

When I brought the bread into work today, they all started smiling and giggling again seeing the bolillo carrying bolillo. When I told them I bought some for myself, they were all pretty interested in telling me how to make tortas, which are sandwiches, and what I should put on them/how I should prepare them. It's so funny to see them get excited about me taking the smallest step into their world. I even got invited to go down to Mexico with them the next time they go. I told them that of course I would want to go. Not sure if they were really being serious or not, because they were laughing when they asked. Don't be surprised to hear I'm taking a trip down there in the coming months.

P.S. Güero also means white person, literally "fair-haired". I get called güero all the time by the cooks and occasionally by customers. I guess it's nicer than saying bolillo or gringo. You just don't learn this kind of stuff in school.

Two Steps Back and a Step or Two Sideways/Diagonally

2008-04-29T23:14:00.005-05:00

If you haven't heard, yes, I'm moving back in Greyskull. For those of you who weren't aware, that's the name of the house I lived in my junior year of college which spawned He-man Nights, many a game of Smat, Greyskull Ride, the Pirates vs. Ninjas party, the 4 Room Challenge, and yes, the infamous Greyskull Soundtrack (featuring the hit single "Jezebel"). As of June, James, Brandon, Jonathan and I will inhabit this most modest of dwellings on E.N. 12th. James, Brandon and a few other guys (who are moving out come end of May) are already living there. It's pretty funny to think about. It seems that every move I make these days is reverting backwards. Watch out Mom and Dad! You're next (not really I hope)!

This upcoming Sunday, I'm flying up to Seattle to hang out with Ross. Happy birthday to me! Not only is it exciting because this will be my first days off in 6 weeks, but also because I really miss that guy. Our friendship is something I value deeply, and it'll be great to have some face-to-face time. I can't wait to see what kind of trouble we can get into this time around!

Aside from that, I got a new phone a couple weeks ago. I had my last phone for nearly 3 years. They've made a few advances since then. My new phone has a camera, mp3 player and pedometer. So fancy. It even came complete with a pair of little speakers. Don't be surprised if you're around me and I suddenly bust them out. I'm a little excited.

Also, I broke my personal bike record again. I hit 63 miles yesterday. Man, was I tired. Only 4 more months of training left!

From "Rider" to "Biker"

2008-04-12T22:18:00.004-05:00

I feel like I can officially say that I am a "biker." I'm not longer just a casual "rider" meandering through city streets or doing a Ride and Decide. The reason: I hit the 50 mile mark for the first time today, making a total of 90 miles this week. I think I'll always be more of a runner than a biker, but there's a slight possibility that, as I train for the ride in September, I might be won over. I don't think I've told everyone about what the ride entails, so here it goes. My dad and I are going to ride from Canada to Mexico down the west coast this September. As you may know, this is the kind of thing my dad does from time to time. He's been from Seattle, WA to Portland, ME, from Montana to Alaska and various other trips all over the U.S. I'll be the rookie on this trip, but I'm counting on my youth (and a lot of training) to aide me in keeping up with the ol' man. I've never been to the west coast before (unless you count AK or the Seattle airport) so I'm pretty excited about seeing some new ground. If there's anything I absolutely must see in Washington, Oregon or California (somewhat near the coast), please let me know. Needless to say, this is going to be a sweet man trip.

Riding 50 miles would have been a great way to spend 3 hours of my Saturday if it weren't for the fact that I had work 20 minutes after I arrived back at the house. Oh dear. Upon arriving at work I scarfed a taco salad and went along my way cleaning and filling "the new section." I wasn't looking forward to my 6 hour shift being as tired as I was, but I found surprising clarity and spiritual focus. It was great. There was a kid going crazy and screaming and his parents were getting mad at him. I prayed that peace would overtake the table, and seconds later the kid stopped crying and soon after the whole table was laughing and having a good time. Realizing I was in sync with God, I took advantage of it, and for the first couple hours, I had a great time of prayer for my coworkers and friends. It ended up being a moderately busy night, so I'm exhausted now. I'm going to sleep hard tonight.

Sunburn from bike ride=bad. Cookies and cream ice cream from the paleteria=good.

Money In the Dryer

2008-04-02T22:57:00.002-05:00

You know how sometimes you find money in the dryer and you get excited about finding 50 cents. Today I found 50 dollars. I had left my tips in my work pants.

THE END

Easter and Stuff

2008-03-26T23:20:00.003-05:00

On Sunday, Jonathan and I hosted an Easter potluck. I was expecting 10 or 15 tops, but we ended up with about 25 people. If you've never been to our house, it's pretty small. The kitchen/living room was piled high with food and people. If anyone else showed up, they would have had to sit in other people's laps. It was good times. The potluck was complete with casseroles, Mexican food, deviled eggs, lasagna, fried chicken, cookies, pink salad dessert stuff, fruit, tea, veggies, mashed potatoes, sweet potato pie, and probably other stuff I'm forgetting. Needless to say, everyone got plenty to eat. I was struck by how great my friends, both new and old, are that live here in Abilene (of course, like a father loves his children equally, I cherish my other friends equally who live in AK and scattered everywhere else). I hope to make the most of my time and deepen friendships before our stays in Abilene are over. I know these are people who will encourage and affect me the rest of my life.

Other than that, I've been chuggin away on the Spanish, working on finishing up some song I've been writing and buckling down on my training for the Canada-to-Mexico ride with my dad this coming September. This is obviously a major training time in my life where I'm being equipped for the future, near and far. It's requiring a lot of self discipline, but I'm finding a surprising amount of energy to complete daily tasks. God's definitely pourin on the grace. It's been extremely helpful/motivating to feel a sense of purpose in my daily activities. Good seeds are being sewn, and surely there is a harvest of good fruit coming.

Oh Dogs!!!!!!!!!

2008-03-13T17:05:00.003-05:00

Just to warn you, I'm not going to talk about anything important in this entry. I hope you will be mildly amused if you so choose to continue reading.

You would think that my daily 0.3 mile walk to work would be a nice, quiet stroll where I could mentally prepare myself for the imminent onslaught of salsa-crazed patrons. Ya, that's the expectation I usually start out with.... but then comes the dogs. Dun-dun-duuuun!!! I kid you not. On a good day (or bad day depending how you look at it) I walk by nearly a score (that's 20 if you're not Abraham Lincoln) of yipping, skipping, yapping and snapping little critters who have nothing better to do than interrupt my peaceful, little 3-block saunter. That's almost one dog per house passed! To me this seems a little disproportionate for a west Texas city block. I know you're dying to know about each moment of my day (you must be if you're still reading), so here's the rundown:

1. First comes Rightie: I have named him this because he lives to the right of my house and has no other distinguishing feature. I've actually never seen this dog. I only hear the occasional bark, sniff or shuffle. I usually forget him.

2. Next comes Leftie (Brownie to his friends). You guessed it. He lives to the left of my house and is a medium-sized chow-like animal. During the day hours, Brownie (that's right, I consider myself his friend during the day) lies dormant. I have come to discover he's merely saving his energy for the smallest noise to provoke him once I go to bed. I think Leftie thoroughly enjoys barking ceaselessly in the wee hours of the morning, especially right by my bedroom wall (Jonathan can verify this). While Brownie rarely directly affects my daily walk to work, I will sometimes remember my angst from the preceding night and glare in his direction as I pass by. That'll learn'em.

3. The rest of the way down my street is uneventful with only the occasional dog siting, and I only have my favorite dog trio coming into sight to think upon. As I turn the corner, an elderly woman releases the hounds. I'm totally serious. This lady waits for me to pass by every day and lets her dogs out to briefly keep me company. If her dogs weren't so sweet, I would resent this. Ok, I lied. Really only one of the dogs is sweet. The other 2 are pretty useless. As the door cracks, Puggie, Lil6 and Lil7 burst forth in all their canine glory. Puggie is a little scruffly pug. For literary purposes, I call the other two Lil6 and Lil7, because they're just little nondescript black things with no personality (I'm assuming Lil1 through Lil5 have already come and gone in the long line of Lil-dogs I presume this lady has owned). I usually don't give Lil6 and Lil7 much attention, because Puggie is putting on the real show. Puggie quickly scales down the ramp into the front yard and gracefully puts on the brakes just before running into the chain link fence. Puggie ferociously kicks leaves and grass backwards as he grunts and sniffles heavily. On a good day, he might get one bark out. He's an introvert. Lil6 and7 start off on a mission, but quickly lose resolve and train of thought and abate to wander around the yard in confusion occasionally attacking a helpless leaf. Take that plant! I'm pretty sure they're blind and senile. Make no mistake, Lil8 (and possibly Lil9) will be soon in coming. I laugh, give a wave to the old lady and continue on my way.

4. The next block or so is a little sketchy in my mind because of what dominates the balance of my walk. Looming a few houses down on the left is "The Pack and Friend". Oh dear. More than filling the presence of their 1000 square foot yard, Collie, Grayie, Blackie, Labbie and Spottie prepare for full-auditory assault with their across-the-fence friend, Yippie in tow. Collie is a medium-sized collie, Grayie is a midrange, shaggy gray dog who's shaved in weird places, Blackie is an averaged-sized, black post-puppy, Labbie is a black lab, Spottie is a small black dog with gray spots and Yippie is a tiny brown dog who has a really high pitched bark/yip. Here's how it starts: From a long way off Grayie will spot me and start barking to alert "The Pack" of pending danger. Ya, I'm pretty dangerous. Then, from the four corners of the globe, the rest of "The Pack" rushes the fence in hopeful expectation of ruining the peacefulness of my walk. This alerts Yippie who, without haveing a clue of what's happening chimes in with his painful yipping and starts bouncing up and down. All the dogs give it a good bark, except Blackie. Blackie is the only good dog in the mix. As I walk by, I usually say, "Blackie, you're the only one I love." After I pass by, most of the dogs give up the dream and let me be, expect Collie and sometimes Grayie. They continue barking at me until I am completely out of sight and/or earshot. I have different strategies for dealing with "The Pack". On somedays, when I'm feeling a little feisty, I'll act like I'm not paying attention, and then out of nowhere, I'll quickly turn to look at them and pounce toward the fence. That really sets them off. I then proceed to quickly glance around to make sure no one saw me provoking the dogs. On other days, when I'm feeling a little more annoyed, I'll just simply stare them down and shake my head in disapproval. When I'm feeling a little apathetic, I'll just walk by slowly and stare off into space thinking they'll lose interest.

5. In the heat of "The Pack's" attack, I get caught off guard by Scrufflie and Scrafflie. They're 2 small, gray rat-dogs who give a yelp or 2 and quickly back down when I look in their direction. Domination.

6. After that I'm home/work-free and quickly navigate by a few uninteresting dogs and enter the safety of Los Arcos.

It's as exciting as it sounds.

Where the Mop Hits the Tile

2008-03-09T16:18:00.003-05:00

The last few weeks have been great. I've again learned how important it is to work and have some semblance of structure in my life. It enables me to be so much more productive in everything. One of the biggest things has been motivating me to learn Spanish. I've settled into a nice little routine M-Th which usually goes something like this:

1. Wake up at 8:30 or 9:00 a.m
2. Check my email, play guitar and eat breakfast
3. Work the lunch shift
4. Play more guitar
5. Go to the library to study Spanish for a couple hours (I'm 1/3 of the way through La Quinta Montaña)
6. Workout/run/ultimate frisbee.

As you can imagine, I'm learning a few things working as a server. I won't go into all of them now, but being that I'm a server, I've been thinking a lot about serving, both in and out of work. Despite what you may or may not think, I don't naturally just love to do stuff for people all the time when it gets in the way of what I'd rather be doing. When I'm enjoying a conversation with someone, I don't want to go do the dishes. When I'm resting after a hard day, I don't want to jump up and take out the trash. Shocking, I know. I've recently been making a point to read through the gospels repeatedly for some help in that area (since Jesus dominates in that area (and in just about everything else (that's worth doing))). I'm learning the beauty of being the least, the last and the lowest.

One of the biggest places the rubber has been hitting the road has been interacting with one of my coworkers who can be a bit, shall we say, unpleasant sometimes. She is eager to give advice (whether you want it or not), but not so eager to take it. I started to find myself, during and after work, getting stuck thinking about how annoyed I was with her and about what I was going to say the next time she told me to do something again. I was reminded to pray for those who persecute you, so I started praying for her (I know there are much worse forms of persecution). I was reminded to do to others what you would have them do to you, so I helped her out knowing the favor probably wouldn't be returned. I was reminded give to the needy in secret so that I would be rewarded by my Father, so went out of my way to do things for her and not even hint that it was me who had done it if possible, because I didn't want my reward to be her approval. I was reminded that he who wants to become the greatest must become the least, so I started to intentionally take the worst jobs and keep her from having to do them.

It has been so incredibly freeing. My attitude has changed so much. Through an ample supply of grace, I'm starting to judge the success of my day not only by how much I make in tips, but also in how much I was able to serve those around me. Today I finally felt these labors taking root in my heart and become pure and life-giving. I can feel my love growing for the rudest, dirtiest, cheapest, and hardest-to-get-along-with coworkers and customers at Los Arcos. As if that wasn't enough satisfaction, I'm even starting to see small, positive changes in the behavior of my aforementioned coworker. Man, Jesus knew what he was talking about with all that foot-washing stuff.

The Two and Two

2008-02-14T16:26:00.002-06:00

Los Arcos is so local. What I mean by that is that many of its employees and customers live and/or work within a couple miles of it... like me. Los Arcos is in a large residential area and borders (or is in, I don't know exactly) what I've heard called "Little Mexico". I'm sure you're smart enough to figure out where that name comes from. All the time, I see people walking from across the street to come in and eat. The owners' house is literally right across the street. One of the dishwashers lives 4 houses down from me. It's a restaurant's for the people, by the people. I've already started to notice there are several people that frequent Los Arcos. It's very apparent that the majority of our customers come weekly, if not more frequently. I've definitely even seen some people eating there 3 or 4 times in my first week of working there. There's always a buzz of conversations going on between multiple tables and servers. Everyone knows somebody. I never know if they were previously friends or have just seen each other every week for the last some odd years and conversation has deepened beyond razzing each other for always ordering the #10 (The 2 and 2 plate). I'm sure it's a combination. It's weird for me to see the same dozen people every day (coworkers) that I don't even live with. I've been dropped into a tight knit community that I have no choice but to become part of, not that that's a bad thing. Speaking of which, I better get to studying Spanish so I can understand half of said community.

Apurate Cocinera!!!

2008-02-10T23:06:00.000-06:00

Work has been going pretty well. Every day is increasingly easier. I still have a lot to learn, but I am starting to feel comfortable in knowing what I'm supposed to do. When I originally talked to the owner about how many shifts I'd have, she said she only had 3 shifts per week, but she'd see if she could get me some more. Man did she. I'm working 7 days a week with a double on Fridays. Just in case you're interested in coming to see me at work, here's my detailed schedule:

Sun: 9:30-3:00
Mon: 10:30-2:30
Tues: 10:30-2:30
Wed: 10:30-2:30
Thurs: 10:30-2:30
Fri: 10:30-2:30 & 5:00-9:30
Sat: 3:00-9:30

It's been very interesting being in a different culture. I've found out that almost everyone loves it when I try to use Spanish. It's been pretty great having so many people around who are speaking Spanish and more than willing to help me learn, customers included. There are a couple regulars that told me next time I wait on them, they're going to speak to me entirely in Spanish. It's so fun. I'm adding a handful of words to my repertoire daily. The most diverse interactions have been with the cooks. There's only one cook who speaks English, but I think he's only part-time. The full-timers only seems to know food/kitchen related words. Jose, the head cook is my favorite. He's got a sweet, curly mini-mullet and 'stache. He totally dominates. He loves to razz me and talk to me in Spanish. A couple of the other cooks haven't been won over so easily. At first, it seemed like Maria (not to be confused with Maria the server) refused to believe I could speak any Spanish. When I'd ask her a question in Spanish, she'd get someone over to translate. When I'd answer her finger pointing in Spanish, she would just repeat the choices in English even though I had already said "pollo" (chicken), "res" (beef) or "queso" (cheese). Finally, after 4 days, I think she's finally starting to believe I know some Spanish. As I was leaving today, she actually said see you later and asked if I was working tomorrow in Spanish. It's only a matter of time before we're chattin away. I also found out there's one other person I work with who isn't fluent in Spanish... but this is her last week. It seems learning Spanish is God's will for my life.

Los Arcos: Not to be Confused With "The Golden Arches"

2008-02-07T21:54:00.000-06:00

Four or five months ago, when I realized I was moving to Abilene, I started looking for a job. I had little idea what kind of job I was looking for. What I had was more or less a list of what kind of job I didn't want: jobs I've already done that I was pretty sure weren't my "calling" (i.e. accounting). You may remember I got pretty far along in the screening process for an insurance job before I was abruptly sent an email saying "they were continuing their search". After that fell apart, I pretty much lost all my job momentum. I applied for all kinds of jobs, some I was qualified for and some I was overqualified for, but to no avail. At this point, I was pretty discouraged. I've never had any trouble getting a job before. Somewhere along the way, I thought, "why don't I just get a job at Los Arcos?", but I didn't apply. A part of me even felt like maybe that's where God was leading me. I didn't trust that feeling though. I thought that I had to be making it up. Then I got in a wreck and just like that, no longer had transportation. I again thought to myself, "I should just work at Los Arcos. I could walk to work from my house and work on my Spanish." That voice came back again, and still I pushed it away. After all, I do have a college degree and they'd probably laugh at me for applying, because I'm unmistakably white. I didn't have much trust in my ability to hear God's voice, so I gave into fear and didn't make a move. I narrowed my search to places close by and applied for a couple jobs that I thought should have been a sure thing. Nothing. I became really discouraged and tried to think of reasons why I couldn't seem to get a job. Was it because I had a gap in my work history that looked suspicious? Was it because I shouldn't be living in Abilene? Was it because I didn't know the right people? Was it because I had moved so many times in the last year? Was it my fault, was it someone else's fault or was God behind all of this? As January came and went, I aimlessly looked for any answer and finally just had to come to the conclusion that I had no clue. For the first time in 2 or 3 years, I couldn't see where my path was at all. I had to admit that I didn't know what obedience looked like in my life anymore and I was botching the whole thing. I could think of so many possible next steps, but didn't know which was the first step (or if there even was one right choice). It was a time to lean into God's grace and hope for His hand to be clear and visible. It was all I could do.

A few weeks ago I was having a time of prayer and decided to read out of the Bible a bit hoping God would reveal something to me. I ended up in Jonah reading about how he ran away from God's call and those around him suffered because of it. Don't you know reading that sent my mind a million directions. I could think of half a dozen possible meanings to that, so I logged it away until further notice (which it turns out was while I was writing the previous paragraph) when hopefully that would make sense. Shortly after that, after some more hopeful job opportunities had fallen through, I decided I would get away from the job search and work for my dad for a week. During that week, I felt a little bit of healing and some hope returning. This Sunday, my last day in Arlington, I was eating some Chinese food with my mom and the fortune cookie said, "You will finally make a long overdue personal decision." Now I must say, I do believe God speaks through all kinds of things, including fortune cookies. I half jokingly, half seriously thought, "I guess I should finally apply at Los Arcos and get a job." Two minutes later, Katrina calls me, but my phone's on silent, so I don't realize it. She leaves a message saying her and Mark are eating at Los Arcos and the waitress complained that she had to work that day, because someone was quitting and I should apply. No joke. I still wasn't confident that this was God speaking to me, but I decided that I was going to apply this week.

So, I picked up an application on Tuesday (I thought they were closed Monday, but it turns out they're open for lunch that day). After I filled out the application, I was still doubting that this was for real. I halfway decided that if this didn't work out, I was going to work for my dad for a little bit to save up money and then take a trip to Costa Rica (you can get round-trip tickets for $350 in February!). The next day, I stopped by during the slow time with my application hoping to score an interview right then and there. I had been going through hypothetical questions and answers in my head, so I was ready. When I gave my application to the owner, she looked it over for a second and we talked about what shifts were going to be open. She said she'd call me that afternoon when she knew for sure the shifts that I could work. No interview. As the afternoon came and went, I started thinking about how she seemed amused when I was talking to her and how she was probably planning on blowing me off. Stupid gringo. When 7 o'clock rolled around, I gave up the dream. I popped in The Sting and wondered what to do next. Obviously, my imagination had gotten the best of me, and I had been making the whole thing up in an effort to make myself feel better or something.

At 9 p.m., the my phone rang. Before I fished it out of my pocket, I tried to think of who could possibly be calling that I wasn't going to screen. I wasn't in the mood to chat it up. It was a number I didn't have in my phone. It had the Abilene area code. Here came the final nail in the coffin. Sure enough, it was Los Arcos. Instead of telling me something like "they were pursuing other candidates" or "they're continuing their search", she asked me if I needed to work. Surprised I said, "soon would be good." She told me to come in the next day at 10:30 a.m. After finding out what I needed to wear, I hung up and wondered, "what happened to having an interview?" I sat in disbelief. Did I just get a job?

Sure enough, when I showed up this morning, they put me to work (after asking if I was there to pick up a takeout order). The first thing the owner asked me was if I had been a server before. I could tell she was expecting a yes. When I said no, she paused for a very long second and awkwardly smiled saying, "Well, I hope you like it." Later on, after asking me some more questions, it was clear she hadn't really read my application. After going over the menu, their policy on substitutions, where to drop off tickets and where to put dirty dishes, she said, "The next table is yours. If you have any questions, ask Debbie." Nothin like hittin the ground runnin.

I felt a little overwhelmed today at times, but I'm pretty excited about it. It's 3 blocks from my house, I don't have to wake up early, I don't have to sit at a desk, I get sweet Mexican food for free and I get to work on my Spanish. I'm most assuredly the only gringo who works there. No one in the kitchen really speaks English aside from the names of food. I don't know exactly what shifts I'll be working or even how much I make an hour. All I know is I've got a job, I'm pretty sure God's behind it, I made $27.72 in tips today, and it feels good. It'll be interesting to see what happens over the following months in this cozy, very authentic Mexican joint.

Just to clear things up (in case you're wondering) Los Arcos means, "The Arches."

Back in a Tent

2008-01-29T22:00:00.000-06:00

This last weekend, I slept in a tent for the first time since I was shot. As you might guess, sleeping in a tent again made me think about everything that went down last summer. Many people have asked me what I learned, how I've been affected, or what's changed as a result of being shot. It's been hard to give answers because of how many different and interconnected answers there are to those questions. In this one post, I am going to attempt to answer all those questions in no particular order, so buckle in. It's a short novel.

1. Awesome People - Firstly, in everything that happened, I was so encouraged by the reaction of the body of Christ: my brothers and sisters. From the very start Ross was there. Night and day, he was there. There's a good chance I would've died if Ross wasn't on top of things that night and didn't get me to a good hospital when the 1st one didn't even have a real doctor working. In the next couple weeks, Ross was a stud (as usual). He had to deal with every bodily fluid you could imagine, plus get woken up by me repeatedly in the middle of the night. On top of all that, he was my bouncer, interpreter, doctor, closest of friends and tons of other things. Right behind Ross were tons of Christians in Ecuador. There were people from the church we had gone to the night before that would come to visit me almost every day. Eduardo came twice a day usually. There were other Christians I had never met who brought us things like flip flops, cells phones, food and money, gave us rides to places and interpreted for us. There must of been at least 50 Ecuadorians who visited me in the hospital. My parents dropped everything and made it to Ecuador a few days after I was shot. That's pretty impressive considering my dad was all the way in Africa at the time. Their presence was so encouraging and their attempts at communication in Spanish were entertaining to say the least. Also, I was so blessed to have them get me back to the U.S. and continue taking care of me. When I got back to Texas, my family was awesome (not that they weren't before and don't continue to be still). My sister, brother and aunt Sara took turns staying with me in the hospital. They picked up where Ross left off. They all got a chance to read to me as I would inevitably fall asleep several times requiring them to go back a few pages each time and reread. My mom and dad went back to work but still came to the hospital for several hours a day. Sara got to deal with me for a couple months after that back at our parents' house. She took such good care of me, walked me at the mall and drove me all over the metroplex. I also had some awesome doctors who not only worked to heal my body, but prayed for my well being. Next came the thousands and thousands of Christians who prayed, visited, hugged, sent cards, gave money and made food. Their response, both in quantity and quality, was shocking. I expected my friends, relatives and a few people from church to visit and send cards. Instead, I received dozens of visitors, 100's of cards, 1000's of dollars and 10,000's of prayers, if not more. It was amazing. I saw first hand how powerful and mobile Christ's body can be when called to action and united in purpose. It is incredible to have 1000's and 1000's of people caring about and fighting for your life, many of whom have never met you. So, thanks to each one of you. I feel like God gave me a peak into what He sees everyday from His children and into what He desires for his church to be doing daily. Huge blessing.

2. I Had It Coming - I don't mean that in a I-was-bad-so-I-should-have-been-punished kind of way. What I mean by that is that God had been hinting that some kind of persecution was waiting for me in Ecuador. In one of the blogs I wrote shortly before I left, I indirectly talked about that. Of course, I hardly expected to be shot. Who grows up in suburban America and really expects to ever be shot? I was picturing something more like people not being my friend or getting a bloody nose. I see being shot as a spiritual attack more than anything. It shouldn't surprise us that when we do follow God, we become Satan's target. As a result, I haven't had a hard time coping with the fact that God allowed me to be shot while on a trip to serve Him. I'd even say I was joyful about it at times. Those verses about rejoicing in suffering and enduring trials are real, though I know it can sometimes be extremely difficult to rejoice in the midst of suffering.

3. Not Gun-Shy - I'm surprised and thankful that being shot hasn't caused me to be fearful. Quite the opposite actually. For instance, when I was in a wreck spinning out of control last month, it just didn't phase me at all. I jokingly told a few people that when you've been shot, a car wreck just isn't that big of a deal. I just can't get my kicks pulling 180's and running into trucks anymore. In a real way, getting shot has freed me. My perspective on pain and suffering has been a bit tweaked. Related to that, I have no apprehension in going back to Ecuador. For the sake of people who care about me, I probably wouldn't stay in a tent again. I wouldn't want to cause them unneeded worry.

4. No White Picket Fence - When I saw a flash, heard a bang and the tent stopped shaking, the first thing that went through my head was, "did I really just get shot?" It wasn't panic or fear, but disbelief. I suspect this is somewhat normal even for those who live in dangerous places or fight in wars and know their life is on the line. Days, weeks and months after it happened, I would still have moments when getting shot didn't seem real. I'd look down at my scars to make sure it wasn't just a vivid dream I had woken up from. This might be normal, too, but it made me think about the paradigm I grew up in that still shapes how I view the world. I don't know whether everyone explicitly said it or it was just something implied by people around me, but my expectations for life were pretty simple. Growing up I thought I'd go to college, get married around graduation, get a normal 8 to 5 desk job, work my way up, buy a house, have a few kids, coach little league, go to church twice on Sundays and once on Wednesdays, be a deacon and then an elder, rarely leave Texas, except on the occasional mission trip somewhere in the contiguous 48, raise my kids to do the exact same thing, retire and die. Up until my junior year in college, I still believed that's where my life was headed. My girlfriend at the time and I even decided we should break up, because she wanted to travel all over the place and do missionary-type stuff, and I knew I'd never do that... So you're probably all laughing now. I had no clue. The life I just described is a great life. That's exactly what a lot of people were made to do. But, I've come to the realization that my life will look almost nothing like I thought it would 4 short years ago. Suffice it to say, getting shot was the final nail in that coffin. I've given up on trying to predict my life anymore. All I've got to go on is what God lets me in on.

5. Did I Think I Was Going To Die? - This has perhaps been the most asked question. The answer is "kind of." I really didn't think about it right off. I lied in the tent bleeding for 30 minutes without it crossing my mind. It wasn't until I was getting carried to the ambulance on a stretcher that I realized I might die that very night. What a weird thought to have... well, not considering the circumstances, but in general. The surge of panic only lasted for a moment and then I felt God saying something to the effect of, "I'm not done with you yet" and peace washed over me. From then on, I didn't think I would die again. I sure came pretty close though.

6. What Was God Up To? - More than anything, I felt protected by Him. That sounds pretty backwards, but it's the truth. Any of a dozen variables could have changed and I wouldn't be writing this blog right now. For starters, the way we set our tent up was strange. It was so awkward, we almost moved it. I'm convinced the banditos couldn't figure out where the door to the tent was, because it was between 2 small banana trees. Who knows what would've happened if they had got into the tent while we were still asleep? Second, where the bullet went in was like hitting a bull's eye. If it had been a 1/4 of an inch in any direction, I probably wouldn't have made it to the hospital alive. Third, if Ross didn't know what was going on, who knows what would've happened in the first, poorly-staffed hospital we didn't end up staying at? Also, after 9 or 10 days, the doctor had decided he was going to do a colostomy if my white blood cell count didn't go down to a certain level by the next day. Thankfully, it did and I didn't have one. Months later, when I was having a follow up visit with one of my doctors, she told us how impressed the surgeons were with how bad I was when they operated. Serious nasty infection. We asked her what would have happened if I'd had a colostomy in Ecuador, and she said that would have sent the infection out of control. Seeing all of that gives me confidence that God was protecting me from death each step of the way. 6b. The second part of what I think God was doing is a little harder to communicate. I guess I feel like my trip to Ecuador and getting shot was an initiation into a new stage/season in life. In other words, I feel like that was something that needed to happen so I would be prepared to do the work God has prepared for me in the future. The details of said future are fuzzy at best. If getting shot on a mission trip in a foreign country is a starting point for something, that could mean a myriad of different life directions. I could guess what those are, but that would be a whole other post. In whatever happens, I'm confident that God is straightening my paths by whatever means necessary.

7. New Insights - Another big outcome of this is my new understanding of what people who are dealing with tragedy and suffering are going through. Previously, I had no clue what it felt like and how people would react to you. It was so interesting to see how people I didn't know felt intimately involved in my life and would come hug me and ask me all kinds of questions. Conversely, some others, even among people I know well, just didn't know what to do or say, so they didn't do or say anything. I definitely have a new spot in my heart for people in hospitals and for people who are dealing with a long term illness. I had no idea before.

I'm not thinking of anything else to say right now, but I'm sure there's more. If anyone has any other/similar insights they'd like to share with me, I'd love to hear them. All in all, I feel strangely blessed to have gone through all that and thankful for all the people who have been along my side throughout the journey.

(I eagerly await the day that I get to play 2 truths and a lie with people who don't know me. No one will ever guess getting shot in Latin America is one of my truths.)

A Pepsi Truck Pit Maneuver

2007-12-22T15:29:00.000-06:00

This morning, I donned long johns, a flannel shirt, jeans, a hoody, wool socks, a beanie and gloves in preparation for the drive from Abilene to Arlington, and it wasn't just because I wanted to look cool. This was the result of an exciting week for the Stinson brothers' cars...

We started off the week right with Jonathan coming out of his office to find his car smashed up. Someone decided it'd be fun to bust in a window, hit the taillights and randomly hit other spots on his car. It was so random. They didn't even steal anything.

The next bit of excitement came yesterday morning. I was driving down Ambler, headed towards ACU, when I suddenly felt a nudge and the back end of my car started to slide to the right. My car did a 180 around the front of the Pepsi delivery truck to the left of me into the center lane where I smashed into a huge F-250 in the middle turning lane rear first. Don't worry. Everyone was okay. The Pepsi semi ended up with a scratch on the bumper, the F-250 just had the huge grill on the front of it bent a bit, and my car was totaled. The back bumper ended up touching the back seat, about 3 feet further forward than it should have been. Apparently, the Pepsi driver didn't see me when he decided to occupy my lane.

So now you know why Jonathan and I bundled up this morning to drive 175 miles with the temperature in the 30's without a driver's side window. Good times, great oldies.

Because All the Cool Kids Are Doing It...

2007-12-13T11:43:00.000-06:00

My 7 Things:

1. Pearl Snap Shirts- I just can't get enough of them. I love to go to thrift stores, and though I try and pretend to keep an open mind about what kind of clothes I am looking for, most of the time I only take the pearl snap shirt selection seriously. Only because of an amazing amount of self-control do I only own 8 of them. Let's face it. The epitome of what I aim for, as far as clothes are concerned (and somewhat in lifestyle, too), is to dress like an old-man-hippie-punk, in that order of significance. Similarly, I'm a little irritated with Texas for being so warm most of the time, because I can no longer justify buying flannel shirts: a close runner-up to pearl snap shirts (even better when they're combined).

2. Places- On any given day, I can easily be talked into going to a coffee shop, library, airport, bar, late-night diner, college, hotel or park. I think what I love about these places is the intermingling of people there. These are the kinds of places where such a variety of people can be found. I cannot help finding people endlessly intriguing and thoroughly enjoyable to watch and talk to. I often find myself pondering what someone who I'm not even talking to or don't even know is thinking about or experiencing.

3. Tedium- Though I am thoroughly opposed to living a mundane, task-oriented life, every once in a while, I find great enjoyment in mindlessly doing simple things like running paper through a shredder, organizing and labeling music in a media player, filing papers into folders, cutting and dicing veggies, or sanding down wood.

4. Domination- Related to #2, I love it when people dominate. It so cool when someone does what they do best. There's nothing like seeing an amazing musician play or sing, an athlete make an amazing play, a great cook make a meal (and then me eat it), a carpenter turn wood into a masterpiece, a teacher effortlessly and simply convey wisdom and truth, a father wrestle with his children, a mathematician figure out a staggering problem, a janitor sing and smile as he mops the floor, a doctor diagnose and explain the intricacies of your ailment, a little kid build a Lego castle, or a friend lovingly console a broken-hearted companion. I think it all goes back to God's first command of taking dominion over the earth and us being his image-bearers. In my own life, I am continually on a search to find those things I dominate in and hone those skills.

5. Haircuts and Dentist Appointments- This is highly ironic, since I rarely go to do either, but I love to get my hair cut or my teeth cleaned. I think it's because I can just sit there and get worked on. I'm sure part of it is the sensory input.

6. Music- I'm sure it's no surprise to you that most of my day is influenced by music, whether it be playing it, listening to it, looking for it or finding out about it. This is related to #4. I can easily play guitar and sing for hours without realizing it. When I get a new CD, I will normally just sit and listen to it, sometimes reading the lyrics, and do nothing else so that I can take in everything that's happening in each song. Chances are, if I'm awake and not listening to music, there's a song playing in my head. Most albums and songs that I own quickly become tied to an experience or period in my life, and I usually harken back to that time when I listen to it.

7. 'Staches- I am secretly (okay, maybe not secretly) waiting for the mustache to make a comeback. Truth be told, I'm okay waiting for a few years more, because my 'stache-growing aptitude is lower than I currently desire and will hopefully be far greater by the time the 'stache is socially acceptable, nay encouraged and once again heralded as the epitome of manliness. STEV, grow a 'stache!!!!

My American Gladiators Name Is ARSENAL

2007-12-04T10:34:00.000-06:00

On my quest to recover from a month's stay in the hospital, run a marathon in May, bike from Canada to Mexico this summer and compete on the new American Gladiators in '09, I've been doing a lot of research on diet and fitness to maximize my eating and exercising so that I can be ripped like the guys from the movie, 300. To sum it all up, pretty much everyone tells you to expend more than you consume, eat your veggies, and do stuff that makes you sore (Duh). During my internet meanderings in search of said healthful wisdom, I've run across many plans including Getting Ripped Like Jason Statham In 6 Weeks, Workout Like Genghis Khan, and Lifting Heavy Stuff. The one that Mark and I have most closely (maybe loosely) adhered to is the TNT Diet and Exercise Plan. TNT stands for Targeted Nutrition Tactics. The paradigm TNT pushes is that calories, fat and carbs aren't bad like everyone makes them out to be, but rather employing them at the proper time is essential. The key is to get your body to draw from your fat stores and use up carbs before they can turn into new fat while building lots of muscle. This is done by eating a lot of protein and only eating carbs around weight lifting time and on refuel days, or as Mark and I like to call them, "shock days." Admittedly, the shock days are what drew us to this particular program, because you can do nothing and eat whatever you want 1 or 2 days a week. We've adapted the TNT a bit by adding workouts, racquetball, running, Ultimate, and being a little less (okay, sometimes a lot less) strict on our diet and are calling it the TMNT plan. We're not sure exactly what TMNT stands for yet, but we figure it's gotta be a gooder if it shares an acronym with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. It's been pretty sweet so far. I've gained about 6 lbs. of muscle and Mark's gone down a few percentages in body fat in our month of doing the TMNT.

At 4 this morning, when I was suddenly wide awake, I was hit with a little godly wisdom on the TNT for the heart/spirit. I can’t speak for everyone, but I can confidently say that I am spiritually obese and it's been getting worse. Before I lose you trying to visualize what that looks like, let me explain what I mean. From the time I was a wee lad, I’ve been fed in church and at home with tons of Bible knowledge and theology. I can rattle off lots of Bible verses, I know the popular theology on mission, discipleship and worship, and have read all the “cool” modern spiritual books. Oh yeah, I’ve been fillin up on the “spiritual carbs” for years. The problem is my consumption of spiritual calories has grossly outweighed my expenditure. What I end up with is a weak spirit with a nice, round and pudgy pride-gut, scarcely ready to move with God’s cadence. I am found breathing heavily with my hands on my hips when it’s time to be running the race as to win.

I think the carbs of the spirit are the words, commands and wisdom of God. Just as the TNT points out, carbs must be used up in a timely manner, or they will turn into fat. If we aren’t acting on God’s voice, His words get stored away as fatty knowledge instead of being fuel for the muscles of faith, hope and love. As 1 Corinthians 8:1 says, “Knowledge puffs up.” Bit by bit, we’re more insulated from the presence of God and embarrassed to show our spiritual body when summer rolls around. For example, you might ask me what the most important commands of God are, and I would nonchalantly reply with “love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength” and “Love your neighbor as yourself.” I’ve had plenty of caloric intake in these areas. I’ve brainstormed ways to be an agent of change in my community. I’ve gone through plenty of hypothetical situations in my mind on what I would do if someone asked me for help in some way. I’ve even prayed many times to be used in people’s lives around me. So what’s the problem? I honestly do not know any of my neighbors. Not a single one. I’m embarrassed to admit that. Sure, I can avoid having loud parties, keep my lawn trimmed (ehem), wave from across the street and even be tolerant of the loud mariachi music from down the street at 2 a.m. That kind of “love” for my neighbors is hardly life-changing, if even noticed. Must I have more depth of interaction with them before I can practically love and serve them?

I too often find myself jumping at the chance to fill up at a spiritual buffet multiple times a week, but usually get sweaty palms and a dry throat at the thought of walking 25 feet to my neighbors’ door to introduce myself and invite them over for dinner. Sick and wrong. SICK and WRONG. My priorities are grotesquely unhealthy. I’m the fat guy at McDonalds with the tray full of double cheeseburgers who has trouble fitting through doors. Why does my supposed “abundant life” result in a double chin, love handles and chicken legs instead of huge biceps, chiseled abs and runner’s calves? Truth be told, I dream of being a mighty warrior in God’s kingdom. I want to do amazing things. But just as running a marathon, biking across the U.S., or competing on American Gladiators (I’m kind of joking about that one… kind of) takes months of repeating motions and cross training, I have to practice one act of obedience after another until I am powerfully joining God in his redemption of the world and battling the forces of darkness.

So, right now, I am committing to go on the spiritual TNT diet and exercise plan. It’s time to let the Spirit burn away all the excess that keeps me from living and enjoying the rhythm of God. Part of that is walking to my neighbors’ house today, not tomorrow, and inviting them over for dinner. Goodbye love handles.

Professor-X

2007-11-18T21:38:00.001-06:00

Earlier in the week, my friend Mark told me that Kent, a teacher at ACU and good friend of Mark's (my friend, too), asked if I wanted to be part of what the missions class he teaches was doing on Friday. They had been talking about prayer walking, and I had told Kent about some of my experiences doing that, so I assumed he wanted me to share a little with the class or something. A couple days later, Mark informed me that Kent would be out of own, and in fact, we would be teaching the class... the graduate-level missions class. I thought this was pretty funny considering I not only don't have an undergraduate Bible degree, but I'm not in grad school either. All I've got is that little 'ol business degree. Our duties for the class were to facilitate discussion and to send the students out to prayer walk. Thankfully, I didn't have to prepare a lecture.

We met the class at Monk's (local coffee shop), grabbed drinks and prepared to head out into "downtown" Abilene. We went out in 2's and 3's and, being that Mark and I were the "teachers", we ended up together for the hour of prayer walking. Nothing totally amazing happened, but I could definitely see God joining us (or rather us joining God) in our meanderings. After walking a couple minutes, I felt like we should go up on the roof of the Wooten, an old hotel that has recently been converted into apartments. I told Mark and he informed me you had to have a card to get in. We went for it anyways. As we were approaching the front door, a resident walked out and held the door for us. We went for the elevators where a sign informed us we had to have a card to operate them. So we headed up the stairs, passing by the maintenance guy who told us we couldn't get onto any of the floors, because of locked doors, and eventually ended up looking out a 16th floor window in the stairwell. We gave up getting to the roof and had some sweet prayer time for the city while looking at the rooftops. On the way back down, the maintenance guy asked how far we went up and then without us saying anything about the roof, offered to personally take us up on the roof. He took us up the elevator, through a maintenance closet, up a rickety spiral staircase and through a 3x3 door onto the roof. It was awesome to see and pray for the entire city from 18 stories up.

On the way down, we "coincidentally" ran into Mark's friend, who I vaguely knew, who lives on the 17th floor of the Wooten. She took us to see her business, In Focus, which is located on the bottom floor of the same building. After that, time was up and we headed back to Monk's to debrief with the class. Each group shared what they had experienced and then we had a great discussion about how we can authentically express the hope we have to a dying world. To finish things off, I shared one of my experiences prayer walking which had been absolutely miraculous. All in all, I'd say my first shot at teaching a graduate-level missions class was a success.

What a Studd

2007-11-13T11:38:00.000-06:00

"Christ's call is to feed the hungry, not the full; to save the lost, not the stiff-necked; not to call the scoffers, but sinners to repentance; not to build and furnish comfortable chapels, churches and cathedrals at home in which to rock Christian professors to sleep by means of clever essays, stereotyped prayers and artistic musical performances, but to raise living churches of souls among the destitute, to capture men from the devil's clutches and snatch them from the very jaws of hell, to enlist and train them for Jesus, and make them into an Almighty Army of God. But this can only be accomplished by red-hot, unconventional, unfettered Holy Ghost religion, where neither Church nor State, neither man nor traditions are worshiped or preached, but only Christ and Him crucified. Not to confess Christ by fancy collars, clothes, silver croziers or gold watch-chain crosses, church steeples or richly embroidered altar-cloths, but by reckless sacrifice and heroism in the foremost trenches.

"When in hand-to-hand conflict with the world and the devil, neat little biblical confectionery is like shooting lions with a pea-shooter; one needs a man who will let himself go and deliver blows right and left as hard as he can hit, trusting in the Holy Ghost. It's experience, not preaching, that hurts the devil and confounds the world, because unanswerable; the training is not that of the schools, but of the market; it's the hot, free heart and no the balanced head that knocks the devil out. Nothing but forked-lightning Christians will count. A lost reputation is the best degree for Christ's service.

"I am more than determined that no ring nor limit shall be placed around us, other than that of our Lord Himself, 'to the uttermost parts,' 'To every creature.' I belong and will ever belong to 'The Great God' party. I will have nought to do with 'The Little God' party.

"The difficulty is to believe that he can deign to use such scallywags as us, but of course He wants Faith and Fools rather than talents and culture. All God wants is a heart, any old turnip will do for a head; so long as we are empty, all is well, for then He fills with the Holy Ghost.

"The fiery baptism of the Holy Ghost will change soft, sleek Christians into hot, lively heroes for Christ, who will advance and fight and die, but not mark time. Let us race to heaven; an accident means dashing into the arms of Jesus- such accidents are God's choicest blessings. Don't be a luggage train.

"Fools would 'cut' the devil, pretending they do not see him; others erect a tablet over his supposed grave. Be wise; don't cut nor bury him; kill him with the bayonet of evangelism.

"Hugh Latimer was an inextinguishable candle; the devil lit him, and ever since has been kicking himself for his folly. Won't someone else tempt the devil to make a fool of himself again?

"Nail the colours to the mast! That is the right thing to do, and, therefore, that is what we must do, and do it now. What colours? The colours of Christ, the work He has given us to do- evangelization of all the unevangelized. Christ wants not nibblers of the possible, but grabbers of the impossible, by faith in the omnipotence, fidelity and wisdom of the Almighty Saviour who gave the command. Is there a wall in our path? By our God we will leap over it! Are there lions and scorpions in our way? We will trample them under our feet! Does a mountain bar progress? Saying, 'Be thou removed and cast into the sea,' we will march on. Soldiers of Jesus, never surrender! Nail the colours to the mast!

"Such who look to Jesus are grasshoppers in their own sight, but giants in the estimation of the devil.

"'Follow Me,' says Jesus. 'I will,' we reply, yet somehow forget that Christ pleased not Himself, deliberately made Himself poor to save others and became the first foreign missionary. We all pray to be like Jesus, yet refuse to pay the price. How can Dives be like Jesus?

"The crumbs of Dives are not a dainty dish to set before King Jesus. Try 'cake' for a change, and don't forget to put all you've got into it.

"'What if C.T. dies?' This frequent and foolish question must have its answer. Here it is from C.T. himself, 'We will all shout Hallelujah. The world will have lost its biggest fool, and with one fool less to handicap Him, God will do greater wonders still. There shall be no funeral, no wreaths, crape, nor tears, not even the Death March. Congratulations all round will take place. "And I, if I be offered up, rejoice and congratulate you; do ye also rejoice and congratulate me." Phil. 2:17 and 18 (Lightfoot's Translation). The Wedding March, by special request. Our God will still be alive and nothing else matters. The first Heart of Africa Mission funeral will take place when God dies, but as that will not be till after eternity, cheer up all. Forward! Every man straight before him. Hallelujah! "To die is gain."

"Some wish to live within the sound of Church or Chapel bell,
I want to run a Rescue Shop within a yard of hell."

~C.T. Studd (November 2, 1915)

Women Folk

2007-11-08T11:13:00.000-06:00

I'd be lying if I said that I didn't notice there were a generous number of attractive women in Abilene. I'd also be lying if I said I haven't given any thought to potentially dating/wifing any of them. Likewise, it wouldn't be the truth if I were to say that I've been employing an abundance of discernment on which girls I give priority in my thoughts.

In the midst of spending a lot of time with married/engaged couples, who all want to hook me up, and singles, many of whom are looking for a significant other, I finally received some wisdom and direction on the subject. A sister in Christ sent me a book called C.T. Studd: Cricketer and Pioneer. It's a biography, written in the 1930's, about some rich English dude who dominated in cricket and then found life in Christ and ended up becoming a sweet missionary to China and... well, I haven't finished the book yet. BUT, I read a few more chapters yesterday which focused on C.T. meeting and wifing this feisty Irish lass who was in the Salvation Army, also in China. She was quite a catch, let me tell ya. The thing that was so cool about their getting engaged/married was how it was just a natural step in what they were already doing as they followed God. They were both just toodling around China, being persecuted as "foreign devils" and bringing tons of Chinese people to Christ, neither of them wanting to get married. All of the sudden, they ran into each other and realized they'd make a killer team, since they were called to do the same thing for the rest of their lives. The best part is that after they got married, they didn't slow down a bit. There wasn't a doctor around when the wife got pregnant, and they didn't want to take months off from spreading the Gospel while traveling, so they just decided to have the baby right there in the house. They ended up repeating that 3 times with all their daughters. That's so cool.

Needless to say, reading that account gave me a little clarity on what potentially dating/marrying a girl can and must look like if I'm going to do it. I'm not sure if I'm even going to get married, but if I do, it has to be to a girl who's truckin along with God and is placed on the same path I am. I don't know for sure, because I've never been married, but I would guess that all Christ-following couples dream of working together for the advancement of God's kingdom in complimentary roles which God made them for. If you're called to marriage, what could be better?

Dear John

2007-10-27T00:01:00.000-05:00

Well, I got a generic email from Farmers saying:
Thank you for your interest in our company and your recent submission to our Waco, TX (Abilene) - Property Claims Representative position.
We have reviewed your resume and have decided to continue our search for candidates whose skills and experience more closely match the position. We encourage you to review other open positions at our career site and wish you the best of success in your career search.
Thank you.
I'm a bit disappointed and feel a little deceived. If they didn't think I was qualified simply based on my resume, they should have told me so 3 steps ago before I spent hours filling out questionnaires and applications and driving to Lubbock and back.

This whole Farmers thing strikingly resembles a dating relationship that sputters out just as it's getting off the ground. You know the kind. After a few good dates and lots of flirting (maybe you even hang out with her friends), you're thinking about maybe making it "official", having a DTR (Determine The Relationship) and becoming bf/gf, but then out of nowhere comes, "oh, by the way, I don't like you. But, I still wanna be friends"... Not that that's happened to me before or anything...ahem.

So anyways, that's about how I feel right now, and I'm back to square one again... again. I definitely need some prayer help for some perseverance and encouragement.

Three Flats in Three Days (beat that!)

2007-10-24T11:26:00.000-05:00

I know all of you are dying to know about how my job search is going, so I'll tell you. A couple weeks ago, I put in an application for a Claims Representative at Farmers Insurance. I've put in other apps, but I don't really want those jobs. Last week, a guy from Farmers called me and emailed me a questionnaire to fill out. After I emailed it back, he called me back and I had a phone interview. Then, on Monday, I drove to Lubbock, of all places, and took 4 tests: grammar, communication, math and personality. The first 3 were pass/fail, and I guess the personality test was subjective. Can you really fail a personality test? Anyways, the lady told me I was only the 2nd applicant to pass the 3 tests. So, I should have a face-to-face interview very soon. If I get this job, I'll have a 2 week training in L.A., then 2 weeks of training on the job somewhere outside of Abilene. I'd also get a company car, laptop and digital camera plus sweet benefits and stuff.

In the last 3 days, I've had 3 flat tires. I'm dead serious. On Sunday, the back-left tire on my car went flat. I put on the spare. On Monday, the spare went flat. On Tuesday, I went bike riding and the front tire on my bicycle went flat! (I didn't have a spare either) I couldn't believe it. This is just bizarre. It feels like God's trying to tell me something or the enemy's trying to discourage me. Either way, I have no clue why I've had 3 flats in 3 days. I'm praying I'll be flatless today and break the streak and/or God will shed a little light on the situation. Something else I should add is that I got a flat in almost the exact same spot (11 miles out) the last time I rode out to Ft. Phantom Lake 3 years ago. Weird.

I wonder if there's some sort of World Record that I can break...

Sneeze of Death No More

2007-10-16T10:37:00.000-05:00

This last weekend I headed to Brownwood, TX for a missions retreat hosted by the Halbert Institute for Missions (read ACU) also known as H.I.M. (they're so clever). If you didn't know, I've been strongly considering joining Mark and Katrina Willis (and possibly others) in moving to Chicago next summer/fall to take part in what God's doing there. I'm not going to say 100% that I'm moving there, but I'm definitely keeping my ears open for that possibility. The retreat was pretty intense- not in the playing rugby kind of way. They hit us with 6 hours of lectures, discussions and tests on Friday night, then another 12 hours of the same on Saturday. Needless to say, by the time 9 p.m. and the 9th self-evaluating test rolled around, I was toast. Although it was a bit exhausting, it was definitely fruitful. It gave the Willis clan and I (and sometimes others) some great time to have some needed discussions, thought-sharing, and relationship building.

Something awesome happened the other day. I sneezed. It was unlike any other sneeze ever experienced by any man even to grace the planet earth with his/her rocket-propelled snot, I mean... it was,well... normal, which is what was awesome about it. That's right. It didn't make me tear up or groan or anything. It felt so good I proceeded to sneeze 3 more times. Boo-yuh.

I don't know what's been up lately, but my sleeping schedule has been jacked up. It seems I can only sleep between the hours of 2 a.m. and 8 a.m. I'm lucky if I get more than 5 hours. The latest installment of jacked-up-ness was this morning. I woke up at freakin 5 a.m.! I was wide awake and hatin life. I popped in a CD thinking I could ease back into sleep, but no-a-o. So I popped in CD #2 to no avail. I gave in and got out of bed at 7, played some guitar and decided to attempt my first jog since 0 A.D. (Almost Death). I geared up and headed for my old friend, the ACU jogging track (the 2 mile series of sidewalks circumnavigating campus). It was nice and cool and there was some sweet fog limiting vision to 20 feet. After much strain and heavy breathing, I completed 1 single lap (2 whole miles) without stopping. It felt so good. I guess I can start training for that marathon now. I snagged a shower then headed to Monks for a chai latte, a little Bible reading and some writing. Ephesians was so good this time through. Although it's not my preference to wake up at 5 a.m., it was a pretty good way to start the day. I can't complain.

"The Big Country"

2007-10-05T17:11:00.000-05:00

It still gets me every time when someone, usually on the radio or TV, refers to Abilene and/or West Texas as "the big country". Haha. So anyways...

It's been great to be a little more active this week. Last night I played ultimate frisbee for a couple hours. I prewarned all the players I wouldn't be doing too much running due to being shot and stuff. After playing a while, I got to where I could jog without hurting too much. The problem arose when I reached out to catch a touchdown and did a roll (don't worry I scored). The roll didn't feel all that great, but that triggered some nasty allergies. For the next hour, I fought the urge to sneeze (because it still hurts a lot) to no avail. Finally the battle subsided after showering. I also geared up and went for a bike ride this afternoon. I was cruisin along at 18 mph or so and feelin pretty good, so I figured I'd go to Hodges, 11 miles away, and then come back. What I realized after turning around what there was a reason for the first half ease. Apparently, I had a nice 15 mph tail wind (which translates into a 15 mph head wind) and more down hills than up on the way out. I had much time to ponder upon my miscalculation for the next hour as I trudged back to Abilene, just barely finishing my 22.23 mile ride. Nevertheless, it feels so good to be tired from exercising and not just from walking 15 ft.

Another little fun thing that happened today was coming back to my house this morning, after doing some bike accessory shopping, to find the power off. Good times. When I changed the electricity over to my name earlier in the week, they informed me the wouldn't be able to accomplish this until Monday. Gotta love it. Thankfully I have gracious friends, the Pattersons, who are letting me crash at their place while they're gone this weekend.

In other news, I'm still looking for a job. I'd love some prayers for that. Thanks.

Not As Holey As I Used to Be (In a Good Way)

2007-09-28T10:24:00.000-05:00

When I took off the dressing on my back hole (or the artist formerly known as the back hole) on Sunday morning, I realized there wasn't any drainage on the bandage. I quickly turned around to look in the mirror. Sure enough, there's no more hole. There's just a scar and divot, which will be great for keeping my back from flooding when I'm laying face down in the rain.

I had my last ET nurse visit yesterday, which consisted of marveling at the lack of hole where they don't naturally occur and saying goodbyes. Also, as of today, I'm finished taking antibiotics. It's hard to believe there's no one left to visit or nothing left to do aside from restoring my body to its former perfection, which will be a cinch I'm sure.

I spent the first half of this week in Abilene doing some house and job hunting. I was successful in the housing department and am somewhat hopeful in the job arena. My brother, who's going to be my roommate as soon as he gets a job in Abilene, drove down on Monday, and we hit the real estate market hard. After scouring the four corners of the earth, our eyes rested on 1949 Beckham, which I can now proudly say is my current residence. It was pretty sweet how it worked out. We didn't have to sign a year lease and she gave me the keys before I even paid her rent. I'm officially moving to Abilene on Saturday. So, if anyone has extra furniture, kitchen stuff or anything you think would be useful to me, I'd be glad to relieve you of it.

This whole move to Abilene is still so weird to me. Most days I'm pretty bipolar in how I feel about it. On one hand, moving there is great, because I already have a dozen good friends there and I know the town. On the other hand, it seems so much less exciting than what I've become accustomed (maybe a little addicted) to, and I can already tell I'm going to have to fight the cynicism I left Abilene with after college. What I'm starting to see is that I have to learn to marry the mundane with the magnificent, dovetail the dull with the dynamic, and orchestrate the ordinary with the outrageous. With the simplest of actions and thoughts, I can take part in the Kingdom of Heaven coming - the most exciting thing happening on this planet. There is adventure in Abilene, no matter how disguised it may seem.

Quick Health Update

2007-09-14T22:36:00.000-05:00

I had my tri-weekly dressing change with the ET nurse today. The hole on my back is small enough now that she's using this super glue type stuff called Cellerate to finish off the back wound. It's made of collagen and smells like foot sweat (Don't worry. You can't smell it unless you put your nose up to the tube it comes out of). What's really exciting is that I got rid of my Wound V.A.C. today. That's right! No more man-purse. I feel a little naked now though. It feels weird to not have to pick it up and watch out for tubes all the time... but not a bad feeling. All that's left to do is a few more checkups and applying the Cellerate daily until it's all healed up. Also, the shingles I had were knocked out quick once I started taking the medicine five times a day. I was blessed enough to not have much pain. Thanks for your continued prayers.

Change of Plans

2007-09-11T12:48:00.000-05:00

Part of me still can't believe I'm typing this right now, but here it goes... I'm not moving to Seattle, and I'm moving back to Abilene. I know that quickly you have 1 of 2 reactions (I know, because I've had both of these on some level). You're either excited, because I'll be closer to family and (some of my) friends or disappointed, because it sounds like I'm taking the easy, less adventurous road moving back to the ACU bubble. Before you rush to any conclusions, let me tell you how this U-turn jumped onto my path and why I'm excited about it.

When I made the decision to move to Seattle, it wasn't in response to some writing-on-the-wall occurrence, but rather looking for what I saw as the best option so that I could begin moving forward again and God could order my path. When I told a friend about my change of plans he made a really good point. He exhorted me to be more careful in saying something was God's will. He's totally right. I went back and reread the blog where I announced I was moving to Seattle and I really did use some strong language. The things I cited as pros were true, but I definitely gave them more weight than I should have. So I feel I need to apologize about being deceptive even if I wasn't purposely doing it with evil intent. What I should have said is "here are the facts, so I'm going to start heading that direction", or as it says in the Bible, "if it is God's will I'll do this or that tomorrow." With that being said, I'm doing my best to not over or under exaggerate what my perception of God's voice is. It's exciting to personally interact with the living God, and I'm learning to be zealous about acting upon what I see and hear God showing me while at the same time not doing or saying things in God's name that are in fact not. I never want to make a decision out of fear or making myself feel better, but only seek to be a part of showing God's glory to the world as I honor Him in my body. So here's what I got now...

As I began making plans and telling people I was moving to Seattle, what God was telling me through prayer, scripture and people wasn't meshing as well with the Seattle move as I'm used to happening normally. I wasn't super bothered by this, not wanting to put God into a formula, but knew I needed to still attentively listen God about the direction of my next season in life. What I began hearing from God was basically, "Don't try and take control of this and make it your own thing. Don't rush, but wait for me to show you a different purpose that you don't already know. I'm preparing good things for you, but don't get caught up in the place you're going." After hearing that, the purpose I felt God giving me through scripture was that I had started to learned to follow the Spirit (as you can see not perfectly yet), but it was time to start fully walking out the simplest parts of the Gospel like taking caring widows and orphans, giving to the poor, loving my enemies, praying for those who persecute me, giving to anyone who asks of me, loving God with every part of me and loving my neighbor as myself. I could see God telling me through scripture, that without these foundational things in my life, having "spiritual" experiences or finding my "calling" would only be like gilding my life. Doing the things God already tells us He blesses and loves is so important. God's not tricky when he tells us to do these things. In addition to this, there were things I wanted to happen in Seattle, that as I prayed about them, I was getting an unexpected 'no'. I didn't know how to take all of this until a few days ago, when fuzzy things started coming into focus and pieces started falling into place.

Last weekend, I went to Abilene just to catch up with friends before I took off for the northwest. You have to understand that when I graduated, I couldn't wait to get out of Abilene for multiple reasons which is a whole other story, and I had not once considered Abilene as the next step in my path. On Saturday, I grabbed some Whataburger breakfast with a friend and we talked about many things. As we plotted and dreamed about our roles in the kingdom of God, I was excited about doing God's work like I haven't been in a months. As we encouraged and counseled each other, I could see certain hopes and dreams taking on flesh for the first time. Late that night, I was restless and couldn't sleep. I got out of bed and wrote some emails hoping to wear my brain out. I got back into bed and talked with God. I asked Him what in the world He was doing with me right now, because I couldn't see it and admitted to Him how helpless and unable to do anything truly good I was without Him. At the moment, I felt totally paralyzed and realized my desire to go to Seattle was gone. The only things I was holding onto there were my friendship with Ross and maybe a little bit of my ego. So I gave up and asked God, "What now? What does your will being done on earth as it is in heaven look like right now?" At 4 a.m., I finally drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, I felt a dim peace. As the day went on I continued to wrestle with it and discussed it with a few friends. Finally, on the drive back to Arlington, I started to see clearly what God had been doing all along. I saw God's guidance and the puzzling answers to prayer all fit together one by one. After about an hour of driving, I felt like I emerged from a cloudy haze and all the sudden, I was filled with joy about moving to Abilene and not Seattle. It was so weird, but the feeling was so familiar. I don't know about you, but it usually seems that when God powerfully leads me, it's never anything close to my idea. It's usually not something I was thinking about at all (the whole "His ways are not like our ways" thing). This is another stellar example for sure. After doing a little self-examination making sure this wasn't my flesh seeking the easy route, the only source of apprehension I had left was not being able to partner in God's work with Ross. When I got back in Arlington, I called him up to discuss my moving to Seattle. After talking through some things, I told him what I had been experiencing in Abilene and my possible change of plans. After conversing about it, he agreed that I should stay in Texas. Even though he was saddened we wouldn't be living together, he was excited about my new direction. After I hung up the phone, I just sat there wide-eyed and thought to myself, "I can't believe I'm moving back to Abilene."

Surgeons and Shingles

2007-09-03T21:11:00.000-05:00

Last Friday, I had a checkup with my surgeon. He checked me out and cleared me for any physical activity I feel like! That means on Saturday, I drove for the first time in 2 months. It was glorious. It felt so good to feel independent again. In general, I've just been feeling so much better. My energy level has improved so much. At this point, the only thing holding me back is the wound on my back closing up. It's very small, but not quite there yet.

Before I get carried away with too much good news, I might as well throw in that I've got shingles. For those of you who don't know what that is (I didn't before today), it's related to the chicken pox. Basically, I have a few bumps on the left side of the back of my neck and head running up a nerve. So far, it's been pretty uncomfortable and occasionally itchy, but I hear it can be extremely painful. So, it looks like it's more good times ahead for me. It's viral and usually related to being stressed (I haven't felt too emotionally stressed, but my body's gone through a bit), but not very contagious. You only have to worry about catching it from me if you've never had chicken pox and you use my towel or something of the like. I'm taking pills 5 times a day for it, and it should run its course in a few weeks.

In summary, I continue to improve rapidly, but I'd appreciate your continued prayers for the wound on my back and my newly acquired shingles.

Appointments, Appointments

2007-08-28T11:14:00.000-05:00

On Saturday, I had a visit with Dr. Hendrickson, my overseeing doctor. She said she was really pleased with how I'm healing up. She then went on to give us the rest of the story that all the doctors had danced around while I was in the hospital. She told us that a couple of the doctors had been impressed with me when I entered the hospital. Not because of my stunning good looks or my boyish charm, but because of how badly my insides were infected. She then went on to say that the doctors weren't sure if I was going to make it. Hearing that was really sobering, realizing just how close to death I was. It also made me so thankful for all the prayers and for God choosing to heal me. She also stressed how important it is that I wait to move to Seattle until the wound on my back is completely closed up which brings me to my next visit.

Yesterday, I had my normal Monday appointment with the ET nurses to have the dressing on my back changed. After Kaleen took the sponge out, we talked about how much more time it will take. She estimated 3 or 4 more weeks. At this point, one side of the wound is about 2.5 cm deep while the other side is pretty much zero. It's weird how it's not healing evenly anymore, but it's sweeping in from one side and standing still on the other. So, we're still praying for the miracle of my back being completely healed in the next few days. Keep praying. The only other thing that has to be taken care of besides the back-wound is making sure the infection is gone which brings me to my next visit.

This morning was my check-up with the infectious disease doctor. I had a C/T scan on Friday, which the results of would determine if he would take me off of IV antibiotics. As we walked towards the examination room, I snuck a peak over towards the counter where my next round of antibiotics usually waits for me. I didn't get a good look at all the bags, but I didn't see one with my name on it which gave me more hope. The nurse came in and checked my vitals and told us the doctor would be right in. In a few minutes, he came in and immediately told us the C/T scan had shown that all the infection was gone and the nurse would come back to take out the P.I.C.C. line. The doctor told me how "lucky" I was and how bad I had been when he first saw me. He prescribed a couple antibiotics that I'll take orally for another month, but otherwise I'm done with all that stuff. Thank you God! I can finally wash my left elbow regions again!

So all in all, good stuff is happening and God is working. My prayer for today is that God's will will be done on earth as it is in Heaven, especially in my life.

Pictures from Ecuador and Texas

2007-08-22T23:46:00.000-05:00

For all of you that don't have Facebook or MySpace, here's a few pictures from my time in the hospital click this.

It's Working

2007-08-06T19:47:00.000-05:00

The prayers are doing their job and God is working. We went in today to get the sponge and dressing on my back changed. They measured the size of the wound and it had reduced from 5cm to 4 cm deep and from 6 cm to 5 cm long: a complete cm both ways in only 3 days! That's some quick healing. Thank you for your prayers for my speedy healing. At this rate, it will be completely healed in only 2 more weeks. Keep at it!

Also, here's an update on the funds. After a check I know is coming comes in, I'll be up to $9,000. That's great. My goal is $14,000 which includes the insurance deductible and plane tickets. So only $5,000 more to go. I've been incredibly humbled by people's generosity. I've received hundreds of dollars from people who've never met me and thousands from people I know well. It's been so cool to see God provide for me through family, friends, acquaintances and complete strangers. Thank you so much for your support.

Movin on up

2007-08-04T10:08:00.000-05:00

This has been a decision long in coming, but I feel really good about telling y'all I'm moving to Seattle this fall. You may be wondering, "why Seattle." Straight and simple, that's where I've been seeing God lead me. Firstly, this spring I had complete peace and sureness that my time was done in Anchorage, so I knew it was time for a new place. Another part of seeing that leading is my partner in crime, Ross, being there for his 2nd year of med school at the University of Washington. I greatly value that friendship. Another piece is just plain liking the Northwest US. I like the laid back attitude, the cooler weather and the natural beauty found there. So I'm excited to see what God is preparing for me in Seattle.

I just looked at tickets for early September and a one-way only costs $125... so much cheaper than flying to Alaska! That's right, I said early September. That is the timetable I'm praying for and am asking you to join in agreement with me. In order for that to happen, the wound on my back has to be healed and my infectious disease doctor has to clear me and take me off antibiotics at the 4 week checkup. So let's boldly approach the throne of God together and eagerly await good things from our Good Father. The doctors have been telling me to not get my hopes up too much as it might take up to 2 months to be independent, so that I don't get depressed if it's slow-going. BUT, we are not a people called to be confined to and limited by normalcy and mediocrity. We are part of a heavenly kingdom with a King who is able to do more than we can ask or imagine (Eph. 3:20). We are a pure and holy people with a perfect High Priest and Savior who is at the right hand of God interceding for us (Romans 8:34). We possessors of the mind of Christ by the indwelling of the Spirit who intercedes for us in accordance with God's will (1 Cor. 2:16, Romans 8:26,27). When you think about it that way, no goal or obstacle seems so big (assuming you're seeking to walk in God's will). Thank you for your support and prayers.

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jig

2007-08-01T23:08:00.000-05:00

That's right. At about 9:30 this morning, I checked out of the hospital. We then headed over to one of the doctors' offices so I could learn how to self-administer antibiotics into my P.I.C.C. line (this semi-permanent IV thing that goes into my bicep) where the nurse told us all about meeting her Brazilian husband online, him staying over the first night, them living together and then them deciding to have many kids as fast as possible since they were already in their 30's (they stopped at 4, but may adopt). Ya, sounds fun doesn't it? It gets better. My dad picked up Taco Bueno for lunch and I had my first fast food in a month. Sadly I have to avoid spicy stuff for a little while, so no salsa. I already feel so much better just being free from my hospital cell and not always having tubes running this way and that out of me. I'm pretty tired now, but it's been a good day. One more highlight. I peed standing up and no one monitored or measured it... makes you feel like a man.

I like me some morphine

2007-07-30T18:52:00.000-05:00

Right now, I'm feelin pretty dang good. I have this vacuum sucky thing on my back called a Wound V.A.C. that is helping bring together the wound on my back. Inside the wound, they put a sponge that has to be changed every MWF (just like a college class) and today was the day. The past changes have been excruciating, so today, my nurse gave me a couple pain pills and 2 shots of morphine before the Wound V.A.C. lady came to put in a new sponge and change the dressing. I barely felt a thing. Now I know why people abuse and become addicted to morphine.

Yesterday, something glorious happened. I was awakened at 8:15 (for the 8th time that morning) by the food delivery lady. I opened the lid to find toast, bacon and eggs. Oh yeah. It was such a weird experience. I looked at it and knew it was crappy hospital food, but it was the first solid food I have eaten in 4 weeks. It tasted heavenly. I now have 6 solid meals under my belt/gown. Next up tonight.... my first real shower in 4 weeks. Thank you Lord.

Everything's coming together and I should be out of the hospital Wednesday. I need it. I'm starting to feel pretty antsy. I'll have a while still to heal up before I can continue life as usual. I'll be hanging out at my parents' house for up to 2 months. Please pray it's not that long (not that I wouldn't love to be with my parents another 2 months). I'm starting to feel like me again. God is so good.

It's been a while

2007-07-28T12:11:00.000-05:00

I'm in Harris HEB hospital in Texas right now. If you didn't know, I was shot in the stomach on July 2nd in Ecuador, almost a month ago, and have spent the last month in hospitals in Ecuador and Texas. It's hard to know where to start talking about this experience, so I'm not going to attempt to yet. I'm hoping to get out of the hospital next week, so keep your prayers, cards and phone calls coming. Thanks for you love.

-Daniel

San Pedro and Mantañita

2007-06-30T18:25:00.000-05:00

I´ve been in Ecuador almost a week now and spent a total of only $20 here. It´s crazy cheap and God has provided us with several free meals. After a 4 hour bus ride, we arrived in San Pablo (Saint Paul) on Tuesday. As we headed from the bus stop to the beach to pitch a tent, we saw a church that was open, so we ventured in. After an 1 1/2 hours of singing, praying and teaching, the whole church of 20 people surrounded us and tag-teamed us with questions, handshakes and smiles. They were so warm and loving, so we talked to them for about an hour and they gave us some really good coffee. The next morning, we hooked up with a Rotary group from the east coast, consisting of half 40-70 year olds and half college freshmen, which Ross had encountered on his way to Ecuador. We spent 4 days working building a garden and in a clinic. Ross got to work with some doctors, nurses and a dentist while I was a pharmacist and laborer. We got to play with lots of kids and tell a lot of people, mostly the Americans, about God´s purpose for us in Ecuador. Some seeds were definitely planted and we got to tell people about the life God has shown us. The Rotarians fed us every meal and let us sleep behind their huge beach house under a cabana: God´s provision. This morning after breakfast, we jumped on a bus and went an hour north to a little town famous for its surfing, Montañita. After waffling back and forth a bit, we decided to stay the day. Ross tried to surf a bit while I did a little Spanish studying, then we tossed a frisbee. Everyone stared at us while we played on the beach. I´m starting to get used to being stared at. Apparently being over 6 foot and having blonde hair isn´t normal at all here. I think we´re about to grab some dinner and wonder around town a bit. Keep the prayers coming.

Estoy aqui

2007-06-26T11:31:00.000-05:00

That´s right. I´m in Ecuador. I´m not feeling too talkative at the moment, so this is going to be a short one. I arrived last night at about 11 pm and Roberto and some of his friends were there to pick me up. We took a quick look around town, climbed the tallest hill in Guayaquil, Cerro Santo (meaning Holy Hill) which was a staggering 400 or so steps to the top. They call Guayaquil the flattest city in Ecuador. After that, we went back to the airport to pick up Ross and headed over to Roberto´s Aunt and Uncle´s house where we stayed the night. This morning Ross, Roberto and I prayed together and it was awesome. Roberto prayed in Spanish and I understood most of it which is good. That´s a cool connection and I look forward to hearing about Roberto´s time in Alaska. I definitely have the peace of God, but my flesh is trying to get me to start worrying about the weeks and months to come instead of just living now. God is my provider. I have nothing to fear. I don´t know the plans for the day, but already there are a couple different options emerging for this week. I´ll let you know what God says when I find out what I´m doing. That´s all for now. I´ll try to keep everyone updated as much as I can.

And I'm Off...

2007-06-24T23:22:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow morning, at 7:15, I'm leaving. It's starting to set in. As I look at all the things I'm taking on the trip, I wonder if they're all going to fit in my backpack. As I peak around the corner at the next 3 months of my life, I'm starting to realize the enormity of the unknowns. I knew it would be like this, but knowing it and living it aren't the same. I feel as though I'm at the top of the first big drop of a roller coaster juuuust starting to cross the apex and am catching a glimpse of the steepness of the slope. There's no stoppin now.

Here's what I want you to pray for me:
1. That above all things, my motivation and drive will be love for God and people. (Luke 10:27)
2. That I will be perfected in love and fear will be driven out. (1 John 4:18)
3. That I will offer my body as a living sacrifice, my mind will be transformed and I will be able to perceive and follow God's will daily. (Romans 12:1,2)
4. That I will trust God and not myself, acknowledging Him in all things. (Proverbs 3:5-7)
5. That I will set an example in speech, life, love, faith and purity. (1 Timothy 4:12)
6. That I will choose life and not death. (Deuteronomy 30:19)

I'm sure there's many more things I need prayer for. Please be careful in what you pray for me and exercise wisdom through the Holy Spirit. Thank you all.

No Promise of Safety

2007-06-19T17:09:00.000-05:00

"But how will I know limits from lies if I never try?
There's no promise of safety with these secondhand wings
But I'm willing to find out what impossible means."
-Thrice, The Melting Point of Wax

"Be safe."
"Be careful."

As I've been saying my goodbyes, these are the frequent parting words of friends, family, acquaintances, and people I don't even know. Are safety and being careful really the prime objectives on my trip or even my life? Our culture tells us that comfort, safety and longevity of life are of utmost importance, but Matthew 16:25 says, "For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it."

This verse comes right after Jesus tells His disciples he's about to be taken to be tortured and executed. Peter responds, "Never Lord! This shall never happen to You!" In other words, "You can't die! It's too important that you stay alive! We're all going to live long, happy, safe lives together in our new air-tight kingdom!" (maybe I'm exaggerating a bit, maybe not). Jesus powerfully rebukes Peter saying, "Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men." Jesus knew he would do everything he possibly needed to do in 33 years of life and that there were things he could accomplish only in death.

In Acts 20:22-24, Paul tells the Ephesian elders, "And now, compelled by the Spirit, I am going to Jerusalem, not knowing what will happen to me there. I know that in every city, the Holy Spirit warns me that prison and hardships are facing me. However I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me--the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace." On the way, other Christ-followers, through the Holy Spirit, see Paul's fate if he continues to Jerusalem and plead with him not to go. He tells them he is full aware of his impending pain and death and must continue.

Over and over, followers of the Way die prematurely in the worst ways, many as they are in the midst of sharing the gospel. Are death and pain as bad as they're made out to be? Matthew 10:28 says, "Do not be afraid of those that kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both body and soul in Hell." Phillipians 1:20,21 reads, "I eagerly expect and hope that in no way will I be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain."

Following Jesus isn't a cuddly, snuggly, gooey existence. He promises us persecution, hatred and trials. When I'm brutally honest with myself, I have barely begun to experience those promises and there's reason why. I have been safe. I have been careful.

I'm not trying to go all emo on everyone and blow a few words out of proportion, but words really are important aren't they? Proverbs 18:21 says, "The tongue has the power of life and death..." I understand you are well-meaning when you say this to me and care about me. I really do appreciate that. I don't want love to be lost in this posting. If you're going to tell me to be safe, only remind me of my safety in the hand of the Father. If you're going to tell me to be careful, only remind me to be careful to listen to and obey God.

I know this post has been a bit dark, so I want to let everyone know that God hasn't been telling me that I'm going to die or be imprisoned in Ecuador. I know God has good things prepared for me there and the road to receiving some of those blessings might be rough. I'm ready and waiting. Thank you everyone for your continued prayers, support and love.

I'm Really Going to Ecuador

2007-06-18T22:23:00.000-05:00

Here's my itinerary:

There...

Mon 25JUN DELTA 948         OK     T   LV DALLAS/FTWOR  715A           40F
                                      TH                          COACH
                                   AR ATLANTA       1025A   

Mon 25JUN DELTA 199         OK     T   LV ATLANTA       430P     D M   **
                                   AR GUAYAQUIL     1037P#        COACH

And Back...


Sun 23SEP DELTA 199         OK     T   LV GUAYAQUIL     1130P    B M   28A
                                   AR ATLANTA       555A#         COACH

Mon 24SEP DELTA 1117        OK     T   LV ATLANTA       830A           13E
                                   AR DALLAS/FTWOR  937A          COACH
                                      TH        

That's definitely when I'm leaving, but there's no guarantee my return
date won't change.  Only God knows.

A Brief Jaunt to Italy

2007-06-17T19:13:00.000-05:00

I woke up Friday morning and spent a little time reading Matthew. I forget what I read specifically, but afterwards I felt like I really needed to get out and serve someone and soon. Right after I logged that thought away, I told my dad I was about to head over to the job (I'm working for him doing construction, if you didn't know) and he informed me he wasn't going. Apparently, it was the set up day for the Tour 'd Italia, the yearly bicycle ride my parent's bike club puts on in Italy, Texas that raises money for some non-profs. *Ding*. So I went ahead and obeyed the Holy Spirit on that one and told my dad I wanted to go and help. Man did I get what I wanted the next 2 days. I won't go into all the details, but I'll just leave it at, I was dang tired after Saturday afternoon rolled around and there were 20 tables and 600 gallons of water to blame. There were a couple things God showed me this weekend. The first came at about 6 am Saturday morning.

It had been pouring down raining since 4:30 am (I know because that's when I got up) and it was flooding. We were distributing the supplies for the rest stops at the bank across the street from the main rest stop, because it was way too muddy for us to unload across the street and we didn't want to mess up the town sheriff's yard. The ice machine was still plugged in over in the sheriff's yard so the rest stop teams had to walk there to grab bags of ice. One of the guys, driving his truck and trailer, decided he'd make this quick and easy and drive through the muddy yard. (I think it's important to give light to the fact that this same guy had already decided to not park his travel trailer in the same yard as he was afraid it would get stuck in the mud.) Sure enough. He got stuck. None of us across the street realized he was doing this until it was too late. As my dad began to walk across the street to start unloading the trailer so we could put it in another, I was a bit frustrated. My thought process went from "I should just stay here and let him fix his own mess" to "okay, fine, I'll go help" to God saying "this is the grace that I offer." Everyone pitched in and rushed around and pulled everything together to get stuff where it needed to go and the ride started on time. My dad even offered, as a representative of the bike club, to pay for the cost of the wrecker and fixing the yard showing that not only did they still accept him, but that they were in it with him. What a powerful image of what God's grace is. When we were at our lowest and worst, having looked and still leaped, God steps in and pulls us out of the mud. As Romans 5:6-8 says:

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

We, as His body, are agents of that grace-administration (1 Peter 4:10) saying we still love you and we're beside you in your stupidest, most embarrassing moment. Of course, you still have to accept that grace.

The other thing was my surprise at people's behavior. At the bike race, I was taken aback at how many adults in their 40's, 50's and 60's were still desperately grabbing for life both from having control over others (no matter how false their facade of control actually was) and from being accepted by their peers. I expect this kind of behavior from kids, adolescents and 20 somethings, but from grandparents??? I guess I had always assumed people get past their insecurity and neediness by the time they have grand kids, but you can never be filled that way. This behavior was sharply contrasted with that of my dad (formerly the bike club prez) who everyone kept asking what to do (even the ones acting like they were in control of everything) and he has no title or position in the bike club now. He was only there to serve and be least among them. How true is it that there's only one source of water that never leaves you thirsty? Our identity and security has to be in the completeness only found through God's adoption.

All and all, I am again amazed and incredibly thankful for God's love, mercy, hope and life that He freely offers all who call upon the name of his Son. Thank you Jesus. Amen.

A Ten Mile "Run" and Some Conviction

2007-06-08T16:41:00.001-05:00

WARNING! If you read this, you might realize I'm not perfect (like I'm sure you all think) and it's a bit on the long side of things, but worth reading (if you really care about me) in my humble opinion.

I got off work early today and decided I would go for a 10 mile run. Now you have to realize, I've just started running again in the last few months and usually run 3 miles 2 or 3 times a week. The last time I had run 10 miles was 4 years ago when, for a year or 2, I had been consistently running 4 times a week, playing ultimate frisbee 3 or 4 times a week and lifting weights 2 or 3 times a week. To say I was being a little overambitious wouldn't be a stretch. A cold front and some showers had just come through and had brought it down into the 70's (ya, that's cool for 2 pm in Texas in June). So I threw on my running gear and took off down the service road of 287. At about the three mile mark, I was starting to think maybe I should go ahead and head back under the next overpass. But, I asked God what he thought and asked for the light to turn green if I should keep going. Sure enough, as soon as I was within 5 feet of the intersection, it turned green and I continued on my way. As I was running, I noticed there were a butt-load of churches. There were seriously 4 within 1 1/2 miles. As I approached the 5 mile mark, there was a huge hill and a head wind, so I decided I would walk a bit and then continue on with my run as I turned the corner and went back up the other side of the highway. I walked under the overpass and ran about another 1/2 mile and then the reality of the situation hit me as I stopped to walk again. I looked up and realized that not only had the clouds disappeared, but it was approaching the 90's and my much-anticipated tailwind had vanished (along with my desire to run another step). So there I was, mad at the weather man for lying to me and stuck with 4 plus miles to walk back home. Lame.

I decided I would make the best of it and talk a bit with God (since He was the one who got me into this back at the stoplight!). As I thought and prayed (and hoped a car would come to take me out of my misery, give me a ride or at least give me a little breeze) I began to notice that not only was this road traveled much more quickly by car and I was developing a sweet farmer's tan/burn, but there was a lot of trash on the side of the road. That's when God nudged me and this whole long run-walk-thing became a huge parable for my recent life.

My first 18 months in Alaska were amazing and spiritually tranforming with continual growth. I learned so much about God, had awesome brothers and sisters to partner with and was blessed to be apart of what He was doing in the world. [Parallel: when I was in awesome shape in college]. During that time many supernatural things happened including receiving the call to go to Ecuador this summer. But... after Christmas, I started slipping into disobedience. It was an easy, smooth, slipperly and slow slide. I barely noticed. I won't go into all the details, but my biggest form of rebellion was not working-- physically, not having a job--mentally, not being serious about learning spanish--spiritually, walking in obedience to where I knew God was leading (very related to the physical and mental). [Parallel: the 2 years after college when I wasn't super physically active]. So what happens when you stop exercising? Your energy level drops, you sleep more and you're just less there. On top of that, you quickly forget how much better it was when you were taking care of yourself. The same priniciple is so true in other areas of life.

As I finished my time in Alaska, I was drained and cynical. I wasn't walking in darkness, but I was sure walking in lethargy. Not only that but God was clearly telling me how important it was that I prepare to meet His work in Ecuador [Parallel: all the churches on the side of the road]. I have to admit to you that my flesh is crying out for me to justify myself, to tell you about all the good things I did and how I was still better than a lot of people, but that's deceptive and unimportant. All I can really say to you is "sorry", because I robbed God and you. God had so much more for me and, by association, the whole Body fo Christ, but I basically said "No, I'll be fine living off the blessings of the past and my own effort." [Parallel: the 5 miles I actually did accomplish running while it was still cool outside]. So, I'm asking for your forgiveness, no matter if you think I actually wronged you or not, because I did.

So does that mean my life's ruined and I'm stuck with the consequences of a 5 months of disobedience? NO!!! As I was about to finish the 10 miles, the lyrics from the song I was listening to (the 3rd time through the same CD, yep it takes me a while to get things sometimes) really hit home. They're from the song "The Tease" by Evans Blue (not a Christian band). The chorus goes:

Hold your hands into the sky
Pray for mercy, instead of time

So true! My first instinct is to want to have more time, words, rest or whatever, so that I can fix all my wrongs instead of falling on the grace of Jesus as He redeems all things. That's the beauty of God! As I walked down the service road of the highway, I did just that: raised my hands to God and prayed for mercy, because I really can't make up for my sins. It was an awesome moment, and I'm sure onlookers just thought I was trying to catch my breath. Hehe. 2 Timothy 2:20-21 says:

In a large house there are articles not only of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay; some are for noble purposes and some for ignoble. If a man cleanses himself from the latter, he will be an instrument for noble purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.

What that says to me, is that God's uses everything and everyone for his purpose, but he lets us choose whether or not we're going to enjoy it. In other words, we can be the fancy silverwear or the toilet. We can be feeding the body or serving it in other ways... Not only that, but we can be can be promoted from one end of the spectrum to the other (take a second to let that one sink in) if we so choose. So what do we do about it? The next verse says, "Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart." Not easy, but so simple and so good.

So where does that leave me? Yes, God wants me to take this journey [the green light], but it's going to take a bit longer and be a bit more painful getting there than I was anticipating [the five miles of walking and looking at trash as the Texas sun beat down on me]. I was planning on leaving for Ecuador this week, but it looks like it might be another week or 2 before I can go. The last few weeks in Texas have healed and rejuvenated me as I remember what it's like to walk to God's rhythm. Praise be to God for His continual patience, His enduring love and yes, His disipline! Amen.

In Texas

2007-05-29T22:45:00.000-05:00

I've been in Texas a few weeks now and it's been insane. It seems everyone I know is moving and I'm "conveniently" around. Lucky me. But really, it's been good to serve people (I need it). I've been cramming as much Spanish down my throat as I can handle and have been pleasantly surprised with how much I can understand now. I still suck at speaking, but I guess that's what Ecuador's for, right?

God's definitely been humbling me these last few weeks. I'm beginning to realize how safe and comfortable I was starting to get in Anchorage. You have to keep pushing or you start to stagnate. That's one of the reason's I'm looking forward to Ecuador. God always does His best work in me when I'm uncomfortable. I can't wait to just take it and like it. As I promised you all (or maybe both of you who read the last blog), I will now tell more about why the nut I'm going to Ecuador.

It all started one dark lonely rainy night in a little cabin a.k.a. "The Trap" in Girdwood... Actually it was summer and Ross was there, but it was almost definitely raining (as all you Alaskans can vouch for). Ross and I were discussing possible possibilities for the following summer seeing as it would be his last chance for freedom before becoming like a slave to medicine (but more importantly to grace). Independently, we both desired to go to Latin America, so we decided to start scanning the globe for our impending travels. Instantly, while looking at a map of S. America, I was drawn to Ecuador. Didn't know why. Then, I talked to my friend Kristen and she recommended Ecuador as a good choice upon my mentioning of said Latin American trip (I had not told her of Ecuador). Then, Ross received a MySpace message from a high school buddy who was in the Peace Corp stationed in... you guessed it... Ecuador. This was starting to be more than mere coincidence. At this point, we were pretty sure God was directing us. To seal the deal, we were talking to some kids (I say kids, but they were college freshmen) at Sal's in Soldotna (always a good place for an important decision) and told them of our plans to travel to S. America the following summer. When they asked where, we told them to tell us. They looked at us a little funny and then Christie said that momentous word... Ecuador. Can I get a witness?!?!? I don't know about you, but that's Gospel to me. All of that happened within about a week. Right from the start, because of how much warning God has given us, I'm expecting huge things from God this summer. I should also say, that God showed me I should start learning another language about 6 months before that. Sadly, I kind of blew it off and forgot about it until Christmas time. His grace is sufficient! Thank God He makes us worthy of His calling and finishes our resolves for good. Amen!

It begins...

2007-05-21T23:16:00.000-05:00

Seeing as I'm going to be far and away this summer, I thought it might be a good idea to start a blog as to keep communication time to a minimum. Plus, I know all of you have been dying to know what I do EVERYDAY of my life. Not really. I'm not going to be that guy. I guess I'll start by explaining the name of my blog since it probably intrigues/offends/bores all of you. Recently, I was (or maybe still am) in a band with Ross called "Too Restless For Texas." I think the name of the band is pretty self-explanatory. I would describe our sound as indie/folk/britpop/hippy/trancecore/salsa, but that's a little wordy, so I'll just tell you I play guitar and sing and Ross plays the djembe (a hand drum) and occasionally the trumpet (always a treat!). In an effort to keep you thoroughly entertained, I'll quickly move to a slightly amusing anecdote (as my mom and aunts would say) about a cool God thing that happened today.

So I'm going to Ecuador. Wasn't that a gooder?!?!

Okay, just (mostly) kidding. Here's the real story that I'll somehow manage to tie into my fake anecdote (ya, I'm that good). One of the things God's really been speaking to me about Ecuador is being prepared. In an effort to comply with that, I decided to find some Christian Ecuadorians via Facebook and MySpace. I ended up emailing about 15 people and have been sporadically receiving responses of varying lengths and proficiencies in English. There have been some good responses, but the highlight would have to be one I got today. One of the Ecuadorian guys who emailed back not only loves Jesus, but is going to travel to Girdwood, AK and work at the very same hotel/resort I worked at!!! Isn't that crazy. Seriously, what are the odds?? I have no doubt God's hand was in this and he's just whetting my appetite for things to come. Man, this summer's going to be amazing! I can't wait!!!

This concludes my maiden blogger voyage. I hope it was both enjoyable and beneficial. I'm sorry if my humor was totally lame and you wish you could have your 3 minutes back. I promise all my blogs won't be so corny!!! Adios.

...In the next episode of "I'll hopefully come up with something," Daniel will explain the intricacies of Columbian 7.5"x10.5" envelopes and perhaps touch a bit upon his travels abroad.